Tag: Tennis
What 20 Years As A Tennis Coach Taught Me About Making A Living From My Passion
20 years ago (September 2003), I began working as a tennis coach.
At the time, it represented a major step forward in my life.
Prior to that, I’d never enjoyed a single moment of the jobs I’d worked. I spent my entire time working in a sports retail store, as a bartender, at a call centre and working in data entry, clock watching and praying for the end of the day.
This was the first job, I thought, where I was actually going to enjoy the work and get to make a living doing something I was interested in.
What happened next is 20 years of lessons learned, surprises and personal growth.
Making a living from one of my passions was not, in any way, shape or form, what I expected it to be.
I now share this story in the hope that I can help you on your journey.
Here are the five lessons I’ve learned from 20 years as a tennis coach.
1. Your Passion Might Need Tweaking
Before starting work as a tennis coach, I had the romantic notion that all I needed to do was gain my coaching qualification, find the clients, and everything would be great.
I expected each lesson to be fun and inspiring. This was one of my passions after all, and I’d read that when you align yourself with something you love, special things happen.
The reality of coaching (at the time, I mainly taught groups of 6 to 12 children in one class), though, was very different.
It wasn’t fun. Often, the children behaved badly and the lesson was more about maintaining order than teaching the students anything of value.
Worse still, I discovered that the ethos of the coach I was working with (he initially hired me to work with his coaching company) wasn’t congruent with mine.
For him, tennis coaching was a business and although he did his best to ensure the lessons were run well, the concept of developing outstanding tennis players was secondary to making money.
A month into what I thought was going to be a dream job, I started to have doubts.
For a moment, I thought about quitting. I had all these expectations about what making a living from my passion would be like and none of them were being met.
Fortunately, though, I decided to stick it out.
Despite the difficulties I had in maintaining discipline, and the coaching ethos not being what I imagined it would be, I had one thing going in my favour.
While on court, I was in charge. I had the autonomy to make the work what I wanted it to be.
This took a long time. I had to learn about disciplining children and improve my coaching skills. However, with the passing of the years, I was able to fight for less children in my class and ensure that we were working towards a motivating goal (playing in team competitions and coaching the most talented kids to work their way up the junior rankings).
Eventually, I made the work more rewarding and enjoyable. However, the process taught me an important lesson.
No matter how passionate you may think you are about a certain job, or role, you never know what it’s going to be like. The idea and the reality are often very different. However, this doesn’t mean you’re without scope to mould your passion into what you want it to be.
Henry David Thoreau once said, “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” This also applies to making a living from your passion.
2. Experience Trumps Qualifications
I’ve never done any further qualifications than my initial, entry level course to become a tennis coach.
Why?
Because I’ve never needed to.
- The first 7 years of my tennis coaching career were spent working for coach who had his own coaching company.
- The next 5 were spent working at a sports centre after I broke away from this coach and set up my own business at one of his venues (more on this to come).
- In 2016, I moved to a new tennis club and have been performing the head coach role there ever since.
This progression is slightly unusual for a tennis coach with only the standard level of qualification (there are two higher levels which many coaches in my position will take). However, my reasoning for never gaining these qualifications is that they will take up A LOT of my time and money while failing to turn me into a better coach.
I’m not a big fan of qualifications. By and large, I view them as box ticking exercises.
I know a few people with MBAs and Masters Degrees who spent a lot of time and money gaining these qualifications but never really furthered their careers after attaining them.
What’s the point?
You can learn whatever you need to learn when on the job, by taking smaller, one day or weekend courses and staying up to date with the latest trends and techniques in your industry with online content or a mastermind group of fellow professionals.
Years of desire to learn and improve is what turned me into a good tennis coach, not the letters after my name.
Occasionally, you don’t even need qualifications!
You might remember Lionel Logue, the Australian speech therapist whose true story came to prominence through the Oscar winning film, The King’s Speech. After many professionals with numerous qualifications had attempted to cure King George VI of his stutter and failed, Logue was recruited in the hope his unconventional methods might work.
Amazingly, they did. The King found his voice and was transformed in his ability to perform his royal duties. However, Logue was self-taught and didn’t have a qualification to his name (apart from the most important one – his experience).
3. You Must Embrace Uncertainty
Making a living from your passion is not the same as earning money through a conventional career. Often, there’s no guarantee that you’ll make any money at all.
This level of uncertainty is incredibly testing. Tony Robbins lists “certainty” as one of our 6 essential human needs. To live anxiety free, most people need to know when the next paycheque is coming and what their schedule will look like the next week.
Making a living from your passion doesn’t always afford you that luxury.
This was especially true with tennis coaching.
I’ve had to deal with bad weather forcing me to cancel lessons (I live in England), client turnover when the children inevitably change schools or go to university and the unnerving initial challenge of building a big enough client base to support me.
Initially, this lack of certainty messed with my head. I couldn’t tell whether I’d still be a tennis coach 8 months after I’d started. However, as I got used living without guarantees, something amazing happened.
I started developing the unconscious belief that I’d always be provided for.
Even if there was bad weather, and I’d miss a week’s worth of work, I believed I’d make it up when the sun came out. Even when I branched out on my own, taking the risk to set up my own coaching business after 7 years of working for someone else, I believed everything would work out.
And, amazingly, it did.
By embracing uncertainty and believing I’d always be provided for, it felt like I got into the flow of abundance.
Perhaps it had something to do with living in a more resourceful state.
Because I wasn’t worried about where the next client was coming from, I got on with my job, taught my lessons with enthusiasm, and this enabled me to keep the clients I had and attract new ones either through recommendations or people being impressed with my work.
Or, perhaps there’s a lot of demand for tennis coaching in my area and anyone doing a half way decent job can get enough clients.
Whatever the case, as someone looking to make a living from their passion, I’d advise you to embrace uncertainty.
4. Sometimes You Have To Be Ruthless And Make Tough Decisions To Grow
After 7 years of working with another tennis coach, I decided it was time I branched out.
For a couple of years, I’d been applying for head coach positions at other tennis clubs but hadn’t been successful. So, I hatched a plan to operate independently at one of the venues I’d been working at for the last 7 years.
Of course, this plan wasn’t without risk because it brought me into conflict with the tennis coach who I’d been working with since I qualified.
Despite him never working at these tennis courts (3 of them attached to an LA Fitness gym) and me having done the heavy lifting of running and growing a thriving holiday tennis course programme there, he still very much considered it HIS venue.
Fortunately, though, the managers of the LA Fitness didn’t. They were pissed off with him never paying his rent on time and owing them over £600 in fees. As a result, they were more than happy to strike a new deal with me, allowing me to operate independently at the venue.
To say my former boss was mad about this move was an understatement.
I thought if we met face to face, a fight would have ensued.
I received a couple of abusive phone calls, laced with expletives and I was also threatened with legal action (although on what grounds I’m not sure as I wasn’t breaking any law).
It was an unpleasant experience. However, it had to be done.
On the one hand, I was destroying any friendship I had with the tennis coach who gave me my first job (and that didn’t feel good).
On the other hand, this was a huge opportunity for my advancement (more money, greater freedom and autonomy).
Although part of me liked this man, it was undeniable that he was arrogant, egotistical, a habitual late payer and regularly made a point of letting the coaches who worked for him know who was boss.
In some ways, he got what he deserved.
In some ways, it was a ruthless move on my behalf.
Wherever you lie on assessing whether my decision was ethical, what’s undeniable was that it was difficult.
I expect you’ll be faced with decisions of a similar magnitude on your journey to making a living from your passion.
When you are, understand that it’s ok to be a little ruthless. I don’t regret my decision.
It had to be done so I could continue to grow. That’s the most important point. So long as you’re not REALLY harming another person (my takeover only cost my former boss 10% to 15% of a substantial income), it’s ok to put yourself first.
5. Don’t Let Something You Like Stop You From Doing Something You Love
You probably know me as a writer (perhaps you didn’t even know I worked as a tennis coach and hypnotherapist – and still do).
Writing is my main passion. My life goal is to sell a million copies of the books I write.
However, my journey to making a living from the work that inspires me didn’t begin with writing.
Back in 2003, fresh out of university, I had a plan. I would use jobs that I liked (tennis coaching and hypnotherapy) to support myself while I created a career that I loved (writing and being a speaker).
I created this plan because I believe, and still do, that working just to make money equates to a dull and soulless life. Your work has to be meaningful and enjoyable otherwise you’re wasting your talents and potential (no matter how much money you make).
Ironically, this logic also applies to lesser passions getting in the way of your ultimate goal. For many years, I’ve been guilty of not pushing hard enough with my writing because I’ve had my tennis coaching to fall back on.
Because, for the most part, I enjoy the work, there’s a lack of urgency to succeed as a writer.
You must be aware of this if you’re following a similar approach.
Don’t get too comfortable. Keep your eyes on the prize and know when it’s time to risk something you like for something you love.
GET YOUR FREE COURSE
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
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The 3 Steps to Becoming a Ruthless Winner (and transforming your business success)
There are two types of people in this world.
Winners and losers.
Sorry to be so blunt but, at the end of the day, you either get your life exactly where you want it to be or you complain, makes excuses and accept that your life can never be the way you want.
Is being a winner the most important thing in the world?
No. It’s more important that you’re a good person. But why can’t you be a good person and a winner?
If I had to pull a number out of thin air, I would say 90% of people are losers and 10% are winners. Being a winner certainly isn’t common. Most people will have one, or more, areas of their life which aren’t the way they want.
It’s ok to be honest about this. It’s alright to admit that, in some areas of your life, you’re a loser.
I was a loser for 90% of my life. It’s only recently I’ve turned a corner and changed my mindset (more on this later).
That’s why I can write with authority on this subject. I know the loser’s mindset. I’m aware of all the things you’ll tell yourself that, unwittingly, prevent you from winning.
Right now, I’m going to share them with you.
Then, I’m going to show you how to win.
Step 1: The 5 Lies Losers Tell Themselves
This is, by far, the most important part of transforming yourself from loser to winner. You have to stop thinking, and talking, like a loser.
Every time a loser experiences a setback, or a failure, they’ll tell themselves one of these 5 things.
- I’m not worthy of success
- The world is against me
- Failing to achieve my goal is ok/2nd place is good enough
- It wasn’t meant to be/The universe didn’t want me to have it
- My goal isn’t possible
Let’s explore each one of these lies in a more detail.
- I’m not worthy of success
This lie can arise from low self-esteem or a perverse sense of morality (when so many people are poor, struggling, or losing in life, it’s not right that I should be the one winning). Whatever the cause, this thought must be expunged from your mind. Winning, if done fairly and without exploiting others, is good for everyone because it increases the amount of positivity in the world.
Furthermore, there’s the potential for greatness within every single one of us. You are worthy. It’s the system that makes you doubt your light.
2. The world is against me
When I first published my book, back in 2012, it took over 6 weeks to sell a single copy outside my immediate family. I was devastated. For four years, I’d worked on this project and now it had failed. However, it was a good book (I was certain of that), so I couldn’t figure out why it wasn’t selling.
My ridiculous conclusion? The world was against me. Something in the universe, Amazon’s algorithm or people’s lack of good sense, was holding me back.
Of course, it couldn’t have been my lack of knowledge regarding marketing or my naivety about the online content creating space. Oh no, in my loser mind it had to be because the world was against me.
If you ever find yourself thinking similar thoughts, stop. The world isn’t for, or against, anyone. It just is.
3. Second place is good enough
There are times when a growth mindset is useful. Furthermore, it’s ok if you don’t win every time. Sometimes, you can win just by learning an important lesson and improving. However, there will be other times, with your most important goals, when only first place will do.
Learn to identify these occasions and refuse to settle for anything less than total victory.
4. It wasn’t meant to be
If the universe never meant for you to have something, then it wouldn’t have given you the desire in the first place. The universe wants you to have the life of your dreams. However, it’s not going to give it to you.
Therein lies the distinction you need to understand. Everything you achieve in this life; you are going to have to make it happen. There is no “meant to be.” Instead, there’s just what you want and what you’re prepared to do to get it.
5. My goal isn’t possible
History is littered with unachievable goals that, eventually, occurred. Nelson Mandela once said, “It always seems impossible until it’s done.” He, alongside his ANC comrades, overthrew an entire political system.
Don’t tell me (and especially, yourself) that your dream of being a five figure a month coach, or making a living from your music, is impossible.
If you ever find yourself repeating, or believing, any of these 5 lies then change your thoughts. Winners don’t think this way.
Here’s what they do instead.
Step 2: Pick a goal that you must achieve
I use the word “must” deliberately. This is something you can’t leave this earth without doing. It may be something as simple as having children. Perhaps it’s selling a million copies of your books. Maybe it’s climbing Mount Everest.
The specifics of your goal aren’t important. All that matters is that it’s important to you. Something about what the goal will force you to do, or become, is so significant to your life journey, and development, that to not get there would equate to a wasted, or failed, life.
This goal should be easily quantifiable. You should be able to tell a friend, in one sentence, exactly what you want to achieve and be clearly understood.
Once you have this all-important goal, proceed to step 3.
Step 3: Mentally commit to your goal
What does this mean?
You must develop total certainty in the knowledge you’ll achieve your goal. Make a decision that it’s going to happen.
Then, no matter what you’re faced with along your journey, remain steadfast in your certainty. Never deviate from the thought you’re going to win.
Comply with these 3 steps and something incredible will happen. You’ll keep getting more out of yourself (learning, improving and getting mentally stronger) until you achieve your goal and become a winner.
How I did it
Last year, I experienced my own loser to winner transformation.
It happened on a tennis court, when I was playing in the final of an ITF masters tournament in London.
My opponent had beaten me on 3 previous occasions. I hadn’t defeated him once. However, despite this unfavourable head-to-head, I knew this was my best chance to win.
As the match began, my confidence soon wore off. I was playing terribly. It felt as though I was a puppet, and a vindictive puppet master was forcing me to make the most basic of errors.
It wasn’t long before I dropped the first set 6-0. I was in full-on self-sabotage mode, an experience all too familiar to me both on, and off, the court. However, just as the match was about to run away from me, I made an important change.
I started to alter my state. From years of immersing myself in the personal development world, and through my work as a hypnotherapist, I knew that the frustration and rage I was feeling would only lead to a continuation of my terrible form. I couldn’t hope to play well until I got myself feeling good.
This I did, raising my energy and reaping the rewards of my positivity by winning the second set 6-2.
At this point (1 set a piece), the match, and tournament, was to be decided by a 10 point tie break (first player to get to 10 wins).
It was here that my loser mindset kicked in.
I looked at my opponent and thought, “I’ve done really well. I’ve never beaten this guy and I’ve turned the match around. I was barely able to hit the ball over the net in the first set and now I’ve won the second. I’m proud of that. It doesn’t matter what happens in this tie break, it’s ok if I lose.”
A split second later, though, and I couldn’t tolerate this thinking. It was not ok if I lost. I had to win.
I’d been playing tennis competitively for almost 20 years. I’d done ok but never fulfilled my potential, often self-sabotaging in important matches.
Now, here I was, 10 points away from winning my first ITF masters tournament and beating an opponent I’d yet to record a victory over. It wasn’t the time to rest on my laurels. Second place wasn’t good enough.
Right then, I decided to win. For the next 15 minutes, I didn’t allow my mind to contemplate defeat or relax. I remained focused on victory and narrowly, and somewhat nervously, edged out a 13-11 win.
After this match, something inside me changed.
I could no longer look at low book sales figures on my Amazon reports and feel sorry for myself or wake up in the middle of the night and feel frustrated at not being able to get back to sleep. Neither of these outcomes (and many more) concerned me because I knew, ultimately, I was going to win.
I’d made a decision in my mind that I was going to get what I wanted (more book sales/a full night’s sleep etc). This absence of doubt ensured I remained focused on opportunities and got the best out of myself.
I hope this blog post will help you do the same.
GET YOUR FREE COURSE
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)