Tag: Think and Grow Rich
Struggling To Make A Breakthrough In Your Life? Use My 3 Step Formula To Reach The Next Level
By the time I turned 26, I hadn’t had a date in 7 years.
Let me be clear on what this means.
That’s not going without a date but picking up girls in nightclubs. No, I literally hadn’t had any physical contact with a girl for 7 long years.
How do you imagine this made me feel as a young man, supposedly in the prime of his life?
One word suffices.
DESPERATE.
I was desperate on every level. I was desperate for sex, I was desperate for connection, I was desperate to say I had a girlfriend and I was desperate not to get left behind (it felt like time was running out on my love life).
What impact do you think this feeling of desperation had on my ability to get a date?
Let’s just say it didn’t help.
I probably reeked of neediness and it probably put a lot of women off. However, by the time I’d hit 29, my fortunes changed and I had no problem getting dates and attracting women.
What happened?
I had a breakthrough.
Something within me had fundamentally shifted and I was showing up in the world as a completely different person. And, where once all I experienced was failure, this new person attracted success.
How was this possible?
Although I didn’t know it at the time, I’d hit upon a formula that transformed my fortunes.
It was only later, as I replicated this breakthrough with my hypnotherapy business, that I began to realise what I’d done and codify the process.
Now, I want to share this formula with you.
THE 3 STEP BREAKTHROUGH FORMULA
Currently, you might be feeling similar to the elephant in the picture below.
No matter what you try, you just can’t seem to reach the next level in your life or business.
The good news is, though, that’s all about to change.
Below, I’ll share with you my 3-step formula for creating breakthroughs. Begin using it today and it won’t be long before you see a complete turnaround in your life and fortunes.
Before I reveal this formula, though, I want warn you about a series of mistakes so many people make when they’re feeling trapped and unsuccessfully trying to reach the next level in their life.
I call it “The 3 Step Failure System” and it goes like this.
- Do the same thing as before but try harder. What was it Einstein said about insanity? I’m sure it was words to the effect of doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.
Step 1 is the easiest pattern to fall into. Probably from the conditioning we received at school, we believe trying harder and exerting more effort is the way to create a breakthrough.
It’s not. In fact, it often brings about the reverse of what you intended as the extra effort reveals a lack of belief in your ability to succeed.
Don’t fall into this trap. You may feel like you’re doing something useful but it’s likely you’ll end up more frustrated and confused. - Search for the secret to success. You might look at another author, influencer, coach etc . . . who’s in a position you want to occupy, and think, “he or she must know something I don’t. If I knew that one thing they know, that enabled them to succeed, then I’d be able to reach their level.”
What leads on from here is thousands, or tens of thousands, of dollars spent on attending courses, paying for coaching and purchasing products or software all in the hope that you’ll discover the key to success.
Unfortunately, though, this search can be costly, lead nowhere and suck you deeper into a vortex of lack. - Give up. After much time, money and effort has been spent, you might be fed up and reach the conclusion it’s impossible to achieve the breakthrough you desire. At this point, you give up and accept that life will never be the way you want.
Do you recognise any of your actions or thought processes in the 3 steps above?
I certainly do. I’ve been guilty of repeating step 1 and 2 over and over again. However, through this process of bashing my head against a brick wall, I finally stumbled upon a much better system for creating life changing breakthroughs.
Here it is.
- Learning
- Inner psychological shift
- Persistence
Let’s explore each part now.
1. LEARNING
How does this differ from Step 2 of the “The 3 Step Failure System?”
There’s a nuance at play.
There’s nothing wrong with continually educating yourself and acquiring new knowledge, tactics and skills. This is to be encouraged. However, understanding your mindset while seeking this knowledge is very important.
Are you immersing yourself in the area in which you want to become an expert, learning more and upgrading your abilities?
Or, are you frantically jumping from one piece of information to the next, or from one expert to another, looking for a secret to success which you expect to bring immediate results?
If the answer is the former, then you’re doing the right thing. If it’s the latter, you’re approaching it all wrong.
There’s no secret to success, irrespective of the area you’re trying to create your breakthrough in. Instead, you must constantly acquire knowledge, improve yourself and through a process of mental osmosis, have this become a part of who you are.
I did this in my quest to improve my romantic life.
I read various books (The Game by Neil Strauss being the most helpful), went to see a dating coach and watched online videos of pick-up artists.
Of course, none of these was a magic bullet but, over the course of a few years, they helped upgrade my social skills.
You’ll be able access similar resources.
For free, you can learn from experts on YouTube and social media. You can also strike up conversations with people you meet at conferences, networking events and seminars.
If you have money to spend, you can buy books, audiobooks, pay for courses and coaches (just avoid the ones who charge too much and claim to know the secret to success in your industry) and go to paid events.
Be thirsty to learn.
2. Inner Psychological Shift
This is the most important part of the 3-step formula.
To achieve a breakthrough in your life, you must become a different person.
Does that sound uncomfortable?
If so, think of it like this.
I’m not asking you to cast aside your personality, morals or essence. Instead, I’m saying that there’ll be some part of your belief system or identity that is repelling success.
This is what must change.
Typically, it involves letting go of a negative emotion.
For me, it was desperation.
I had to find a way to transcend my negative feelings despite the fact that, in my mid-20s, my love life was a complete failure.
This was hard to do. If I’d carried on in the fashion I had been, a future where I didn’t have a long-term partner and children was probable.
Somehow, though, I managed to let go.
I told myself that the desperation wasn’t helping me. Furthermore, I was sick of being down and lonely all the time. Even if I never met anyone for the rest of my life, I no longer wanted to live with this feeling.
So, after taking a run on a hot summer’s day in 2009, I decided to let go of my desperation.
That night, I picked up a girl in a nightclub. Two months after that, I had a girlfriend. A year later, I met the love of my life.
I don’t know exactly how your inner psychological shift will occur.
The first step, though, is identifying the negative emotion that’s holding you back.
The next step is to realise that, even if you never get the thing you want, your life is going to better without this emotion.
Then, let it go. Transcend. Despite every justification for feeling the way you do, commit to never allowing this emotion to rule your life again.
Once this occurs, the world reacts differently to you because you are a different person. Ironically, you’ll get the thing you’ve now let go of.
3. Persistence
Don’t underestimate the amount of time needed to create a breakthrough.
Sure, the inner psychological shift I experienced in the example above occurred in an instant but years of learning, revaluation and failure preceded that moment.
So, keep going at whatever it is you want to achieve. No good will come from giving up.
Napoleon Hill lists persistence as the 8th step to riches in the self-help classic Think And Grow Rich.
There’s power in putting one foot in front of the other, again and again and again.
Remember, humans are incredible learning machines and persistence gives you the opportunity to learn something that could lead to a breakthrough. Persisting also gives you the time to develop greater self-awareness and make an inner psychological shift.
While practising persistence, keep track of all the small wins you achieve on your journey (either in your journal or on your phone or tablet). Review these from time to time. They’ll remind you that you are making progress and that your situation isn’t hopeless.
Conclusion
When do we say to a baby, “That’s enough, you’ve fallen over too many times, you shouldn’t try to walk anymore?”
Of course, it’s a stupid question.
So why, as adults, do we shut ourselves and others down?
Stay in the race long enough, always be learning, let go of the inner blocks and a breakthrough WILL occur.
GET YOUR FREE COURSE
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
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Photo by Simone Viani on Unsplash
10 Rules for Mastering your Mind (and getting whatever you want from life)
Your mind is your most powerful tool for personal transformation.
Not your diet, not adopting “good” sleeping practices, not some wonder drug and not changing your habits.
Don’t get me wrong, all of the above are important but, when it comes to making a shift that will render you, and your life, unrecognisable to someone who knew you 10 years ago, it’s your mind that’ll have the biggest impact.
This is because, by mastering your mind (with the 10 rules I’m about to give you), you’ll be altering the cause of your environment, circumstances and present bodily conditions, not just dealing with the symptoms.
The following 10 rules have been created from my 20-year journey into exploring, and understanding, the workings of the mind.
This journey began, and was inspired by, some seminal works on the subject (the following are recommended reading if you want to explore further – The Power of your Subconscious Mind, As a Man Thinketh, Think and Grow Rich, The Power of Now, Psycho-Cybernetics, Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting, Becoming Supernatural), over 15 years of working with clients as a hypnotherapist and, most importantly, my own experiments into using this power to change my life.
Rule 1: Focus on what you want
Starting today, think only about the outcomes you want to achieve.
Are you preparing for an important speech, pitch or presentation?
See your audience being wowed. Imagine your words flowing and the information you’re sharing having the desired impact. Think about people coming up to you at the end, or emailing you, and telling you how good your presentation was and how much inf0rmation they gained.
If ever you think about forgetting your lines, how much pressure you’re under or what you stand to lose if the pitch isn’t successful, then banish these thoughts. Instead, focus firmly on one of the positive outcomes above.
Apply this rule to anything you want to achieve.
Rule 2: Create a daily, mind focusing routine
Every day, take time out of your hectic schedule to focus on either achieving the outcomes you desire or living the life you want.
How much time?
Five minutes is sufficient (but you can spend longer if you want).
At present, all I do is repeat seven goals, 3 times over, upon waking up in the morning and going to bed at night.
Here are three of these goals;
- 10,000 copies sold (referring to my book sales)
- 1 Tesla car (that I want to own)
- 80 kilograms in weight (my ideal weight)
This particular approach may, or may not, work for you. It doesn’t matter. There are many different ways you can focus your mind.
You could;
- Relax, close your eyes and spend 5- or 10-minutes visualising what you want to achieve or the life you want live
- Write out, and repeat, a statement (only needs to be a paragraph or two) describing your ideal life and the experience of living it
- Create a DCA (Definite Chief Aim, see Napoleon Hill’s book, Think and Grow Rich) and repeat it three times every morning, noon and night
Choose whatever method works best for you (or create your own).
Rule 3: Channel your thoughts when your mind isn’t actively engaged
Alongside your daily mind focusing routine, use the moments when your mind isn’t actively engaged to focus on the outcomes you want to achieve or the life you want to live.
Obviously, this doesn’t apply when working, engaged in a conversation, playing a sport or taking part in a hobby. On these occasions, and many more, your mind should be focused on the task, or person, at hand.
However, at all other times (see list below), you can return your thoughts to the contemplation of the outcomes you want to achieve and the life you want to live;
- Washing the dishes
- Cleaning your house
- Driving your car
- Taking a shower
- Walking to work
- In between points while you’re playing tennis
- In between sets at the gym
Rule 4: Keep your instructions simple
Whether you’re completing your daily mind focusing routine, or channelling your thoughts when your mind isn’t actively engaged, keep it simple.
Whenever you focus your thoughts, you’re giving an instruction to your subconscious mind. This part of your mind responds best when fed with clear, concise directions.
For example, if you want to recover from any kind of ailment, or disease, then you would repeat, over and over again (until you receive the outcome you desire) instructions and affirmations like,
- Perfect health
- I am healing
- My body works perfectly
- Health
Alter your instructions depending on the objective you want to achieve.
Rule 5: Make your thoughts visual
To make a greater impression on your subconscious mind, create a visual accompaniment to the thought you’re thinking.
For example, with the mind focusing routine mentioned in Rule 2, I link each outcome to a visual image.
- For 10,000 book sales, I think about writing the number ten thousand down in a diary where I keep track of my sales
- For owning a Tesla car, I imagine myself getting into a black Model 3 and noticing the distinctive interior
- For getting down to 80 kilograms, I see myself with visible abs
All of these images are meaningful to me. Find the ones that trigger a similar reaction in you.
Rule 6: Make your thoughts resonate
There must be an emotional connection with the thoughts you’re thinking and the images you’re visualising. Without this vital ingredient, your thoughts are powerless and will lack the ability to influence your subconscious mind.
It’s estimated that we think around 6,000 thoughts a day. Very few of these have any impact on the direction of our lives. However, if you can inject a thought with a powerful positive emotion then it can bring you the outcome you desire (BEWARE: This works just as well for powerful negative emotions).
In his book, Becoming Supernatural, author Dr Joe Dispenza tells his readers to, “continuously fall in love” with their vision for the future. This is how powerful your emotions need to be.
Rule 7: Learn to live in the now
For peak performance, and to prevent anxiety from holding you back, learn to live in the now.
If ever you find yourself distracted by mindless mental chatter, or worrying about the possibility of something going wrong, ask yourself this question, “Where am I now?”
And then answer it.
Notice everything around you and describe it, either out loud or in your head.
This simple practise forces you out of your head and into the world. As a result, you’ll be able to give all of your attention to whatever it is you’re doing and perform at your best. Furthermore, your fears won’t escalate and prevent you from taking the action necessary to move your life forwards.
Rule 8: Ignore your negative voice
Over the course of an average day, your critical voice is going to throw all kinds of negative statements at you in response to what you’re doing.
It’ll tell you that;
- You’re not good enough
- You’re ugly
- You’re going to fail
- You should give up
- You’re too old to do something
- You’re too young to do something
- Other people won’t like you or what you have to offer
ALL OF THESE STATEMENTS ARE A LIE.
In his book, The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle explains that there are two competing forces in our minds.
The first is the “I,” which is our essence, represented by our personality, emotions and dreams.
The second is the “self,” which is artificial, represented by our internal dialogue.
Tolle teaches us to separate these two entities. Understand that your “self” isn’t who you are. It’s just a very annoying voice, attempting to sabotage the good you intend to create.
Therefore, you must NEVER listen to this voice. Instead, ignore it and, eventually, it’ll weaken and go away.
Rule 9: Don’t overload your mind with multiple information streams
We live in an age where it’s possible to avoid any type of silence or deeper thought.
We have podcasts, the radio or Spotify to listen to. We have Netflix, YouTube or the cinema to watch. And, if we ever need to be distracted, we have social media or the internet, to browse through.
It’s now possible to continuously jump from one information stream to another without ever having to engage in the practise of disciplining your mind or focusing your thoughts.
This isn’t healthy. While there’s nothing wrong with doing any of the above, you must set aside time every day (in addition to your daily, mind focusing routine) to be alone with your thoughts and direct them towards your higher purpose.
Rule 10: Feed your mind with inspiration
You don’t have to do all the heavy lifting.
For the occasions when you’re struggle to motivate yourself, use inspiring songs, movies and books to provide the boost you need.
- Create a motivational music playlist
- Watch the movies that connect you with your life purpose
- Read the books that make you believe anything is possible
Do whatever you can (excluding becoming dependent on drugs) to get yourself in an inspired, high-energy state.
What’s the payoff?
Follow all 10 of these rules and something incredible will happen.
Your subconscious mind will respond by providing you with the ideas, chance encounters and peak states that will enable the realisation of your dreams.
The power to change your life is within you. Your mind can either set you free, or cage you through the forces of fear, confusion and self-doubt.
Faithfully follow the rules above, and give yourself enough time to master them, and there’s no force in the universe that can prevent you from getting to where you want to go.
GET YOUR FREE COURSE
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
How to Gain the Knowledge of 20 Life Changing Books Without Reading Them
Have you ever noticed that, after attending a seminar or reading a book, only one concept tends to stick in your mind? Sure, a day or two later, you can still remember most of the ideas but, six months down the line, how many of them are you actually using?
Probably just one.
With that in mind, I’ve trawled through 20 of the most life changing books known to man to present you with their most salient point.
Do I expect you to apply all 20 of them? Probably not. However, there will be 3 or 4 concepts you take from this blog post that could be responsible for your future life success.
For ease of use, I’ve split the books into 4 categories – Spiritual, Business, Lifestyle and Personal Development. These should cover every aspect of your life and ensure that your growth is balanced, leading to love, happiness and success.
Spiritual
As A Man Thinketh – James Allen
You are what you think. Your outer world is a reflection of your habitual thinking. Therefore, if you want to change your life, you must change your thoughts.
The Power of Now – Eckhart Tolle
Your suffering occurs through not living in the moment. If you can let go of regrets from the past, fear about the future and calm your racing thoughts, then a life of peace and happiness will be yours.
Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting – Lynn Grabhorn
The energy you live with is the key to being successful and living the life you want. Therefore, on a daily basis, find ways to feel great and avoid remaining in a negative state for any length of time.
The Power of your Subconscious Mind – Joseph Murphy
You can programme your subconscious to reveal life changing insights, heal your body and find you love. This is achieved through repeating affirmations, reading written statements and visualising mental movies which all positively state you already are that which you want to become.
Man’s Search for Meaning – Victor Frankl
As long as you have a purpose for your life, you can endure almost any circumstances. Find this purpose through the work you are passionate about, your loved ones or a commitment to bear your suffering with dignity.
Business
The 80/20 Principle – Richard Koch
Your efforts won’t yield result according to a 50/50 ratio. Instead, only 20% of what you do will account for 80% of your results. Discover where your 20% lies and focus your attention there.
Business Stripped Bare – Richard Branson
There are no barriers to entry and you don’t have to follow the rules when venturing into the world of business. All you need is your gut instinct and the wisdom to learn from your experiences.
Rich Dad, Poor Dad – Richard Kiyosaki
You get wealthy through owning assets, not working for your money. This means buying property, shares, bonds, creating/owning intellectual property, investing in start ups and avoiding liabilities like a heavily mortgaged homes, luxury items and credit cards.
The One Thing – Gary Keller
Have one major focus for your life (this can change over time). To achieve this one thing, figure out what the one action you need to take today to get you closer to your overall objective is, and work on that to the exclusion of other tasks.
Start with Why – Simon Sinek
Clients and customers make decisions based in their emotions. Therefore, to get them excited about your work or product, don’t tell them about what you do, or how you do it, tell them about why you do it.
Lifestyle
Willpower – Roy Baumeister
Your willpower is like a muscle. It can be developed but it can also be exhausted. Therefore, tackle major life challenges likes stopping smoking or weight loss, one at a time.
I Can Make you Thin – Paul McKenna
Only eat when you are hungry and stop when you are full. Follow this rule religiously and what you eat won’t be such an issue.
The Game – Neil Strauss
Appealing to other people (in any capacity), is a skill that can be learned. Irrespective of looks, money and past successes, by making yourself stand out, and appearing to be valuable, other people will be drawn to you.
The Latte Factor – David Bach
You have more money than you think. Cutting back on a few insignificant luxuries (your daily Latte) and diverting these funds into relatively high interest investments is the path to your financial freedom.
Easy Way to Stop Smoking – Allan Carr
Addictions are lies. The so-called benefits you think they bring are all psychological. Therefore, there is nothing to lose and everything to gain by stopping and, once you realise this, breaking a lifelong habit becomes easy.
Personal Development
Think and Grow Rich – Napoleon Hill
Write down a statement regarding how much money you desire, what you will do to achieve it (selling a certain product, writing books etc) and the date by which you want to be in possession of the funds. Condition your subconscious to assist you in the acquisition of the money by repeating this statement upon waking up and going to bed.
Psycho-Cybernetics – Maxwell Maltz
Your subconscious works like a guided missile. Give it clear and frequent instructions regarding what you want from life and it will course adjust to bring you your desired outcome.
Can’t Hurt Me – David Goggins
When you think you can’t work any harder, or go any further, you are only at 40% of your true capacity. However, to bring out your hidden reserves, you must break free from your comfort zone.
Never Too Late to be Great – Tom Butler-Bowdon
With advances in modern medicine, and changes in lifestyle, you have many chances to be great at something, or many things, in your lifetime. Take a long-term view of your life and you’ll realise success is virtually guaranteed.
Escape The System – Joe Barnes
Free yourself from the negative influence of society’s conditioning and the possibilities for your life are limitless. You are under no obligation to accept a mediocre life when you have the potential to create a great one.
Did I miss any?
Please share this article with anyone you think will find it useful. Also, were there any books you feel I should’ve included on the list? Let me know in the comments section below.