Let me tell you a quick story.
Back in 2002, I had a dream of becoming a published author.
I wanted to write a self-help book. I’ve always been fascinated by the idea of personal transformation and thought it would be amazing if I could inspire other people to change their lives.
At the time, though, I was a clueless university graduate who’d just returned home to his parents’ house. I didn’t have any experience writing books, I didn’t know anyone in the industry and when I checked the Writer’s and Artist’s Yearbook, it said that almost all publishing companies didn’t accept unsolicited submissions.
Not a great start.
Compounding my doubt, and crushing my motivation even further, were the comments I received from the people I talked to.
As you can imagine, all of these comments had a negative impact on my mindset.
I started to believe that my dream was impossible.
As a result, for the next 5 years, I did nothing (or, at least nothing related to working on my dream). However, in 2007, after the breakup of a newly formed relationships, I decided I needed something to bring me back to life.
So, I began writing my self-help book.
At first, progress was slow.
It took me four and half years and four re-writes to finally have a manuscript worthy of public consumption.
After contacting an agent, and being rejected – thereby having my negative beliefs about getting a publishing deal confirmed – I decided I wouldn’t waste any more time following the traditional route.
Instead, I’d use the relatively new technology of Kindle Direct Publishing (KDP) and upload my book onto Amazon.
It took a year and 3 months to sell the first 100 copies.
It took a further 5 years to reach my first one thousandth copy sold.
My progress was slow and, baring some great feedback from readers, there wasn’t much in my publishing experience to indicate that the naysayers were wrong.
However, in 2017, I attended a YesGroup (a personal development group inspired by the teachings of Tony Robbins) meeting in London. At this meeting, an author called Brett Moran took to the stage and gave a great speech.
Afterwards, I bought his book, chatted to him and then went home.
After reading the book, I noticed he had a UK publisher and emailed him to ask if he wouldn’t mind sharing his contact.
Graciously, he agreed and I got in touch with someone at Watkins Media.
My first offering to them was Escape The System. It got rejected (although with seemingly genuine praise which made me think it would be worth contacting them again once I’d written another book).
That I did, the following year and, to my total surprise, they liked my book and offered me a publishing deal.
Fast forward to 2020 and my book, Do The Work You Love, was published. A dream, which everyone had told me was impossible to achieve, came true.

Getting my book published taught me a powerful yet surprising lesson.
Achieving your dreams is easier than you think.
In fact, I believe you have a 66% chance of being successful (watch this video to discover how I came to this conclusion).
There are only 3 things that you need to do (irrespective of what your dream might be).
They are . . .
You may have thought that the competition for whatever you want to do is vast. So vast, in fact, that it’s not even worth trying.
Let me tell you a little secret.
SO DOES EVERYONE ELSE!
What does that mean?
That 90% of your competition isn’t even going to take the first step to realising their dream. They’re going to believe the statements seen in the picture below, keep working their regular jobs and spend their evenings sitting on the sofa watching their favourite Netflix series.

All you have to do to put yourself ahead of 90% of the competition is take action.
Don’t underestimate how powerful these actions are.
Take a look at the picture below.

These are the sales rankings for my book The Rebel Code on Amazon US. It’s actually a bad sales day. Usually, I’d be floating around the 100,000 ranking and then much higher in the categories related to my genre.
However, even on a bad day, you can see that I’m inside the top 1000 motivational authors in the world.
How did I get there?
There’s nothing particularly special about me and I have no outstanding talents (otherwise I wouldn’t have to work SO damn hard for my success).
I simply took action. Again and again and again.
And while this step won’t win you the race, it will put you in the race (and that’s a lot further than most people ever get).
While achieving your dream is easier than you think, it’s not easy.
You’re going to fail (many times). That’s guaranteed.
Failure is tough and it affects us on many levels.
First, it’s embarrassing. No one wants to be seen falling short of the mark, especially if they’ve told the people around them what they plan to do.
Failure is also depressing. Forget the public embarrassment, the private defeat can be even worse. You worked so hard, dotted every i and crossed every t and yet, it still wasn’t good enough. This can weigh heavily on your soul, causing you to consider giving up.
Finally, and perhaps worst of all, our failures can appear to be proof that our dreams are impossible to achieve. What could be clearer? You tried and it didn’t work out. The naysayers were right.
This is the way most people understand failure. However, you can’t be like most people.
Instead, you have to view failure as an opportunity to learn.
Every time you fail, ask yourself these questions.
Take the lessons on board and then bounce back stronger.
What does this mean?
As mentioned, your failures can take an emotional toll. It’s understandable you feel depressed in the aftermath of a crushing defeat.
However, you must become an expert in allowing this feeling to fade away as quickly as possible and then bringing even more energy to your work the next time you try.
This, combined with the knowledge gained from your prior defeat, will enable you to breakthrough and reach the next level.
Let me present you with a couple of likely scenarios for why you, or anyone else, might give up on their dream.
Both of these scenarios are reasonable, right?
Perhaps.
However, they’re unnecessary.
YOU DON’T NEED TO GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAM SO LONG AS YOU CAN KEEP FUNDING YOURSELF.
Plus, by continuing, you give yourself almost unlimited opportunities to succeed.
There are many ways to fund your dream.
Whatever the case, you must keep 10 to 25 hours a week free to work on your dream. Do this, and you can go on and on in your quest.
Then, with enough time, action taken and lessons learned from your defeats, you WILL succeed.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
Please consider sharing this blog post if you enjoyed it or found it valuable. You can copy the link and send to a friend or share on your social media by using one of the buttons below. Thank you!
Photo by Martin Wyall on Unsplash
You’ve probably already set your goals for 2024.
Perhaps you’ve even failed some of them.
Fear not, though, because there’s an even more powerful tool you can use to create the life of your dreams.
Where are you now? What’s your current life situation – your environment, your relationships, your job, your health and finances?
This is your reality. Your day-to-day life and everything around you are the sum total of your decisions, beliefs, actions and thoughts (of course, your life will also have been impacted by the environment you were born into).
At times, it may feel like this reality confines and limits you, but it doesn’t. Even if it feels like you’ve been living the same reality for years, there’s something you need to know.
Your life CAN change. However, a big part of changing your reality is knowing what you want to move towards.
You must know the answer to the following questions.
How do you want your life to be?
Where would you like to live? What do you want to do each day? Who do you want to spend time with? Would you like to travel? What impact would you like to have with your life?
Now, sprinkle in a little destiny.
What were you born to do? Why is your uniqueness needed?
Answer all of these questions, without notions of what society considers possible or acceptable, and you have your vision.
Now test it.
Is there an emotional draw?
When you close your eyes and conjure up images of how you want your life to be, do feelings of love, inspiration and freedom occur? Does it feel like home?
If you can’t access these emotions then your vision isn’t compelling enough.
Go back to the drawing board.
Answer the above questions again but make sure you’re not limiting yourself in any way.
Remember, the negative energy of society is going to influence you to think so much is impossible. Furthermore, living what society considers a “good life” might not be enough to inspire you.
Break free from conditioned thought. Connect with your heart. Even if it’s telling you to create the first human colony on Mars, go with it. (Elon Musk doesn’t limit his thinking).
Also, be prepared to take your time.
You might have to revisit this exercise on a regular basis and refine your vision until you’ve created something really compelling.
What next?
Now that you have a vision for how you want your life to be, you need to understand how your reality will change.
The Secret, or some people’s misinterpretation of how the book/film works, has garnered a lot of criticism for the law of attraction and visualisation.
Because thinking about your desire DOES NOT cause the immediate manifestation of your thought, many people dismiss the idea that a vision can change their reality.
On a surface level, these people may be right but how long have they persisted with their visualisation?
Have they contemplated their vision, not just in passing moments, but for every day of their life, for months, years and even decades?
It’s unlikely, because if they did, they might find that something incredible occurred.
James Allen explains it best in his book As A Man Thinketh. He writes,
The greatest achievement was at first and for a time a dream. The oak sleeps in the acorn; the bird waits in the egg; and in the highest vision of the soul a waking angel stirs. Dreams are the seedlings of realities . . .
Your circumstances may be uncongenial, but they shall not long remain so if you but perceive and Ideal and strive to reach it. You cannot travel within and stand still without . . . Whatever your present environment may be, you will fall, remain, or rise with your thoughts, your Vision, your Ideal.
Pay close attention to this sentence, “You cannot travel within and stand still without.” Assimilating your vision (through constant contemplation), changes you at a fundamental level (you “travel within”).
As a result, you show up in the world as a different person. This more motivated, confident, charismatic version of yourself, with greater clarity of purpose, receives a different reaction from his or her environment. Doors that were once closed will now open. Ideas that were once ignored will now be embraced.
The world will react differently to you (you travel without) because, through becoming one with your vision, you have changed.
To help you in this process, I thought you might benefit from an example.
Recently, I’ve been reading Arnold Schwarzenegger’s book, Be Useful: 7 Tools For Life. Arnold’s first rule is (and seemingly the most important), “Have A Clear Vision.”
At every stage in his remarkable life, Arnold had a clear vision of what he wanted to achieve. The following example highlights his vision for becoming a champion bodybuilder. Use it as guidance for creating your own.
When I fell in love with bodybuilding, I didn’t have vague hopes of becoming a champion. I had a very specific vision of it, borrowed from the pictures inside of muscle magazines of guys like Reg Park celebrating their victories. I could see myself on the top step of the winners’ podium holding a trophy. I could see the other competitors on the lower steps looking up at me enviously, but also in awe. I could see their tight smiles, I could even see the colors of their posing briefs. I could see the judges standing and applauding. I could see the crowd going wild and chanting my name. “Arnold! Arnold! Arnold!” This wasn’t a fantasy. This was a memory that just hadn’t happened yet. That’s what it felt like to me.
There are a few things you can take from Arnold’s vision.
First, notice the detail. Arnold created an in-depth scenario which he returned to, again and again, in his mind. Small details like the colour of his opponents posing briefs were included, making the vision more real.
Also, notice where he found the inspiration for this vision. This wasn’t something created entirely in his imagination. He leaned on the pages of muscle magazines to prime his imaginative motor.
You can do the same.
Use something real to base your vision upon.
Below, you can see two images I’ve used to help create my vision.
This first is a tiny photo given to me by someone who was at the 2008 Wimbledon Final between Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal. Often referred to as the greatest match in tennis history, it saw Nadal emerge out of the shadow of Federer to win his first ever non-clay court grand slam (and become world number 1 soon after).

As a Nadal fan, this represents the ultimate moment of triumph. He’s collapsed, exhausted but victorious, having played his heart out (I know the picture isn’t easy to see but the white mass is Nadal, the white line is the baseline of the court and his racket is about 10 foot below his feet).
Although I gave up on my tennis dreams decades ago, this moment of triumph resonates deeply.
In my mind, I’ll have a similar experience once I’ve sold the millionth copy of my books. I can imagine myself emotional, collapsed and elated that a journey which has taken me so long, and for which I’ve fought so hard, has finally come to an end.
The second image is from a Christmas card I received many years ago.

It resonates with me because it evokes feelings of a warm, loving home and family. I don’t know if I’d describe it as my dream home but the environment is certainly one I want to create, and live in.
These images are powerful to me. They helped me create a vision in my mind that is full of triumph, love and meaning.
You should now create your own vision.
Remember, visions are visual, so use whatever stimulus and inspiration you can find.
Some people like to create a vision board. If this works for you, use it.

Whatever you do, make sure your vision feels real.
Take note of what Arnold Schwarzenegger writes. He describes his vision as, “a memory that just hadn’t happened yet.”
This isn’t a fantasy.
Some physicists theorise that everything that has ever happened is occurring right now, just in a different dimension.
Treat your vision the same.
It has happened.
It will happen.
Of course, you can always settle for the alternative and dismiss the idea of creating a vision for your life.
Treat it as pseudo-scientific, new age nonsense and just allow yourself to be guided by the society you live in.
Do that, though, and it’s quite certain where you’ll end up. In the words of Tony Gaskins Jr, “If you don’t build your own dream, someone else will hire you to help build theirs.”
Visions are more than just the musings of an overactive imagination.
They provide direction.
If you know what your life is about, and where you’re headed, you won’t fall for lesser goals or settle for anything less than the full expression of what you could be.
Stay true to your vision.
Stay true to yourself.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
Please consider sharing this blog post if you enjoyed it or found it valuable. You can copy the link and send to a friend or share on your social media by using one of the buttons below. Thank you!
Photo by Rahul Bhosale on Unsplash
At no point in history has the average person had more opportunity than in this current era.
Why then, does the human race appear to be more miserable than ever before (if you use rising medication rates for mental health conditions, lack of connectivity seen through declining birth rates in many developed countries and the increase in the cost of living with the associated difficulties this entails, as a yardstick for wellbeing)?
It’s my belief that this collective misery springs from one source – the societies we live in and their ever-increasing influence over our thoughts, decision making and choices.
Society lies to you.
It tells you there’s a tried and tested path to follow and that, if you do so, life will probably work out ok. However, as seen by the malaise referenced above, for a lot of people, this isn’t the case.
That’s why you need to be aware of the following 7 lies.
While on the surface they may appear to make sense, dig a little deeper and you’ll realise they’re nothing more than a recipe for a life of mediocrity and limitation.
Let’s start with the first lie we get told.
Both your parents and teachers will insist that the most important thing you can do in your childhood, and early adulthood, is score good grades both at school and in higher education.
This, they tell you, is the path to securing a good job and making lots of money (or enough money to prevent yourself from struggling through life).
Of course, such advice isn’t completely without merit.
It’s good to be educated. However, education without fostering independence of thought, and an understanding of WHY you’re acquiring knowledge, won’t lead to genuine happiness and success.
Sure, you can take your education and gain access to an array of better paid, and slightly less monotonous, uninspiring jobs, but an education alone is never going to unlock the doors to life fulfilment.
So, what should you do?
More important than your education, is finding something you’re passionate about and putting yourself on a path to be making a living from it in the not-too-distant future.
Make this quest the focus of your life and, as the years and decades pass, you’ll enjoy a level of freedom (and perhaps wealth) that those tied to the stressful and boring jobs their education has earned them, can only dream of experiencing.
We live in a materialistic age.
Whether it’s an advert on TV, an influencer on Instagram or a friend showing off their latest purchase, the message is the same. If you buy desirable products, your life will improve and you’ll feel happy.
It’s a message we must hear and see over 100 hundred times a day.
Through repetition, we become convinced by the logic of this credo.
Furthermore, there is some merit to the idea.
Buy a new car and you’ll feel great for a month. Eat some fast food and you’ll feel instantly satiated. Take a recreation drug and your mood will improve.
However, the problem with seeking happiness through consumption is that it NEVER lasts.
So, what should you do?
Seek happiness through creation.
Commit to the harder path.
Put all your energy into creating something (a book, an innovative product, a human life) that’s useful and brings joy to other people.
The reward you’ll experience will be long lasting and enrich your soul.
The mainstream media wants you to believe it’s a force for good.
It lets you know what’s going on in the world and provides you with an array of subjects with which you can hold interesting conversations.
While this may be partially true you must also understand that the media has an agenda and that the information it provides does not paint an accurate picture of the world.
What is this agenda?
Like any other corporation, media companies exist to make a profit.
Through decades of operating, they’ve discovered that the best way to achieve this aim is by presenting their audiences with a mix of fear and sensation.
Pursuing the truth, the ideal upon which journalism was formed, takes a back seat to audience manipulation.
So, what should you do?
Disengage from the mainstream media.
Reduce the amount of time you spend reading or watching the news, browsing the internet and avoid paying for too many subscription services or magazines.
This will help you disconnect from a world of fear, hate and materialism, creating more space in your mind to focus on the goals you want to achieve.
In western societies, Doctors and scientists are revered as Gods. Their word is final, whether they’re diagnosing an illness, delivering a prognosis or prescribing treatment.
Such status seems reasonable until you remember that doctors are humans and that humans are corruptible, sometimes power hungry and frequently influenced by ulterior motives.
Consider these stats.
So, what should you do?
Of all the lies society tells, this one is the most nuanced.
Doctors clearly do know a lot of answers and DO save numerous lives.
Ignoring them completely would be a foolish. However, placing ALL of your faith in their expertise and adopting an attitude that a doctor is there to “fix” you is also naïve.
YOU MUST TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR OWN HEALTH.
This doesn’t mean rejecting the best that modern medicine has to offer but it does mean prioritising your health in such a way that you reduce the likelihood of ever needing their help.
Politics, and access to political power, isn’t available to everyone.
You need lots of money to become an elected official, the kind of money that most individuals are unable to access.
So, in the US, those running for office must secure the backing of wealthy donors. (In the UK, it’s slightly different as although donors still play a role, members of parliament can sit on the boards of major corporations and receive a salary through holding these positions).
Where do you think these politicians loyalties lie?
It’s not with the people who voted them in. It’s with the individuals and organisations who funded them to appear on the ballot in the first place.
So, what should you do?
Don’t trust your government. It’s not going to help you through life or make the burden of living any more manageable (as this would run counter to the interests of its’ backers).
Instead, you need to educate yourself and become self-reliant.
Refuse to be mediocre (something society will encourage you to do).
Instead, begin strengthening both your character and finances so you’re able to deal with whatever challenges the system puts in your path.
For most people, working life is a cycle of boredom and stress, occasionally interspersed with moments of connection and satisfaction.
As a result, retirement is viewed by society as a watershed moment. It’s the point when you finally get to be free and enjoy yourself.
However, what happens when you get there?
You’ll discover that, because you traded your passions for security, you have little to stimulate you in your newfound free time.
Sure, you could always try doing something new but, because you’re older and burnt out from a lifetime of working a job you didn’t enjoy, you lack the energy to make it anything more than a hobby.
So, what should you do?
Never retire.
Better than that, never start working.
Confucius once said, “Choose a job you love, and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.”
If what you do with your days both stimulates you, and provides enough money to make a living, then why stop?
You get to continue the never-ending flow of learning, creating, improving and sharing, regardless of your age.
What could be better?
Society conditions you to conform and live with the belief that your life doesn’t matter.
Who are you compared to the mass of institutions, companies, countries and religions that exist?
Far better, for your own safety and prospects, that you keep your head down, obey the rules and don’t rock the boat.
However, is living this way really the path to a life of happiness and fulfilment?
I don’t believe it is.
You should want to make the most of your almost limitless potential.
In doing so, you’ll discover you’re far more powerful than you’ve been led to believe.
James Allen once said, “The dreamers are the saviours of the world.” An individual, or a collection of individuals, has been behind every major breakthrough in science, technology and civil rights the world has known.
YOU ARE POWERFUL.
Make sure you use your power, and use it for good.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
Please consider sharing this blog post if you enjoyed it or found it valuable. You can copy the link and send to a friend or share on your social media by using one of the buttons below. Thank you!
Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash
Let me take you back to 2002.
I’d just completed my politics degree and returned home after 3 years at university.
Now, I was faced with the unenviable prospect of discovering what I was going to do with the rest of my life.
I didn’t have many ideas.
I certainly knew what I DIDN’T want to do.
Beyond that, though, I was stuck.
I knew my criteria. I wanted to support myself in a fun and inspiring way. However, I couldn’t identify an actual occupation that would both do that and to which my skills and personality would be suited.
So, I went through a period of experimentation. I tried the following 5 ridiculous options in the hope I might get lucky and find my purpose. (Please note, when I use the word ridiculous the implication is that they are ridiculous for me. For you, they might be a great fit and I wouldn’t want to dissuade you from pursuing them).
As long as I can remember, I’ve always been inspired by movies. Combine this with my slightly extroverted tendencies (I enjoy being in front of a camera or on stage) and acting seemed like a good fit.
I didn’t want to be any old actor, though, I wanted to be a movie star.
At the time, both Denzel Washington and Ed Norton were my favourite actors and I wanted to play powerful, moving roles like they did in The Hurricane and American History X. However, despite my grandiose ambitions, I had zero acting experience and no idea how to make it in the industry.
I had to start somewhere, though, and for me this involved enrolling on an adult education acting course.
Hollywood, this was not.
I attended 8 weeks of this course (probably geared towards people wanting to appear in local plays) and that was enough.
The final straw came when the tutor wanted us to sing while jumping around (I don’t know whether this was for her amusement or whether it’s a legitimate training technique).
At that point, I was out. I felt like I was embarrassing myself and that this environment was a million miles away from my Hollywood ambitions.
What possessed me to pursue this avenue?
Probably an, at the time, inflated opinion of the way I looked and the comments of a school teacher (suggesting I should try out as a model) after I took part in a school runway show.
So, I did what any self-respecting would-be model would do and got my Mum to take some photos of me doing, what I thought were, model poses (but probably looked something closer to Ben Stiller in Zoolander).
I took this “portfolio” up to London and shopped it around at various modelling agencies.
The reactions I received varied from barely concealed laughter to being told I was classically handsome but not model material.
I did have one fan, though, who waited for me at the exit of an agency.
A 50-year-old gay guy told me he had a private room where we could take some “special” photos that were bound to impress the unappreciative modelling scouts.
I declined.
Throughout my life, I’d always been sceptical of religion. However, after reading Joseph Murphy’s The Power Of Your Subconscious Mind, I began to think of it differently.
Murphy regularly quoted the bible and explained the deeper meaning of the words in such a way that was both accessible and illuminating. Furthermore, he referenced the Church of New Thought and mentioned he was a minister of this institution.
It’s difficult to capture in words the impact that The Power Of Your Subconscious Mind had on my life at that time. Therefore, I thought to myself, if there’s some opportunity within the Church to be involved in what Joseph Murphy writes about, then I’m in.
This thought process resulted in two trips to Church.
The first was a regular, if somewhat evangelical, Church where I witnessed scripture readings and several members of the congregation being baptised and “born again.” While the ceremony moved me, it was too traditional, reminding me of the Church I’d known as a child (albeit a far more emotionally charged version).
My second trip was to a New Thought Church in London (the only one I could find – after spending a great deal of time scouring the internet). Here, the service was lot more sombre and sparsely attended.
In truth, it couldn’t have been more devoid of the inspiration I felt in the words of Joseph Murphy’s books. I talked with the preacher/organiser at the end but she dissuaded me from becoming a New Thought minister.
She explained there were limited options in London and that, anyway, the world of politics (I told her about my degree) was in greater need of Joseph Murphy’s teachings than the Church – something I didn’t want to hear.
As much as I wanted to be in front of the camera, creating powerful, moving stories was equally appealing.
So, I got myself a script writing guide from the library and studied it cover to cover.
I thought this was going to be easier than writing a book. However, coming up with a plot, characters and writing dialogue was more complicated than I imagined.
I spent a few summer afternoons, lying out in the sun, wracking my brains but not being able to create anything of note.
A year after all these adventures took place, I signed up to be a Utility Warehouse Distributor.
This was a network marketing scheme that involved getting customers to switch their electricity, gas and internet and recruiting a team of distributers who would do the same.
I was lured by the prospect of setting my own working hours and achieving a substantial passive income once my network grew. However, the product, and the work itself, couldn’t have been any further from my wheelhouse.
I’m not a natural salesman (I used to struggle to sell my own books, so selling something I didn’t believe in was a total non-starter).
After 9 months, and 3 customers acquired, I quit.
As you can tell from this list, I did a fair amount of fruitless searching in my youth.
Some of my ideas WERE ridiculous but did it matter?
Not really because the intention behind the search was pure.
I wanted to do inspiring work. Even deeper than that, I wanted to find my life’s purpose and if, in the process of getting to this destination, I had to go through a period of struggle, embarrassment and rejection, it was ultimately worth it.
That’s the first message of this blog post.
DON’T GIVE UP YOUR SEARCH.
You may feel like you’re wasting time pursuing different avenues that, ultimately, lead nowhere but the mere intention to find your life’s purpose is enough.
As a result of this desire, ideas WILL come to you and opportunities WILL present themselves.
Eventually, I turned my hand to writing self-help books.
I wrote 5 drafts of my first book before I finally released it in 2012.
It wasn’t easy. At many points, I felt lost and couldn’t see how this endeavour was going to work out. However, ultimately, through my confusion and struggle, I found a way and experienced success.
That’s the second message of this blog post.
IT’S OK TO FEEL LOST AND TO STRUGGLE.
A way can be made out of no way.
The thought of getting a book publishing deal seemed unreachable to me in 2008. In 2018, I got signed and the impossible became reality.
The same can happen for you. You can struggle, you can have no idea how something is going to work out and yet, you can still make it through the darkness and find clarity and direction.
How?
HOLD ONTO YOUR VISION.
Even if that vision doesn’t have an identifiable endpoint (to sell X number of books, to be a travel blogger with 100,000 subscribers, to run a business creating and selling affordable eco-homes), the strong desire to experience greater freedom, to feel excited and engaged every day and to have a life filled with love (a love for what you do and to be surrounded by people you love) is enough to get you started.
From here, and through a process of experimentation and trial and error, you’ll find out what is, and isn’t, going to work.
A path will emerge.
That path might fade at times, and take a few wrong terms, but by holding onto your vision (and it improving in clarity as you do so), you’ll eventually arrive at your destination.
Good luck!
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
Please consider sharing this blog post if you enjoyed it or found it valuable. You can copy the link and send to a friend or share on your social media by using one of the buttons below. Thank you!
Below, is a excerpt from my new book, The Rebel Code: 12 Steps To Find Your Place In The World And Win.
This is just a small section from step 2. To read the whole book and get the complete picture on how to become a happy and successful rebel, look out for The Rebel Code’s release on the 4th December (you can get notified and receive a launch week discount by signing up to my newsletter – click the link below and enter your email where prompted*)
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Alternatively, you can pre-order The Rebel Code on Amazon RIGHT NOW by clicking HERE
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On a foggy Oregon morning, sometime in 1962, Phil Knight set out on a run. It was early and as the day broke, he had a revelation.
He was 24 at the time. After 7 years away from home, gaining both a degree, and a masters, and then spending a year in the Army, he’d returned back to Portland, Oregon. What awaited him, midway through his 20s, was a major life decision regarding his future career.
With a degree in business and an MBA from Stanford University, Knight wasn’t short on options. His father was a journalist and he’d considered following in his footsteps or a career in accounting. However, alongside these professions, there was something else competing for his attention.
Knight had a Crazy Idea (his own words).
While studying for his MBA, he’d completed a paper on importing Japanese running shoes and selling them to the US market. This idea was based on a recent trend he’d noticed where Japanese designed goods, especially cameras, were competing with, and outperforming, imports from other countries. If it worked for cameras, he thought, why couldn’t it work for running shoes?
For Knight, this paper was much more than a means to achieving his MBA. It was the seed of an inspired future. He couldn’t stop thinking about his Crazy Idea yet was uncertain about the possibility of it working as a business.
These thoughts, and more, swirled around in his head while he considered his options.
While pondering his future career, Knight also began developing his own life philosophy. His original passion was running. He’d pursued this throughout high school and university, competing for the Oregon team. However, unlike some of the athletes on the university programme, he fell short of reaching international level.
With a career as an athlete out of the picture, he was looking for some way to capture the excitement of competition with whatever work he chose to do. As a deep thinker, he questioned conventional standards of success. Sure, he wanted to have a wife, kids and a house but beyond that, financial gain didn’t provide much motivation. Instead, it was important that he should leave his mark on the world and for his life to have meaning.
All of these thoughts led him to an exciting conclusion. If he could no longer experience the thrill of competing in a 10,000-meter race then he wanted to make his daily work so engaging that it felt like play.
His mind kept returning to this word. There was too much pain in the world, he rationalised. Furthermore, a person could follow all of society’s rules, work hard, do as they were told and still find they were unfairly treated. Therefore, it was far better to pursue your own self-determined dream that felt like a good fit.
Once this thought process was complete, Knight experienced his revelation (while out on his aforementioned morning run). He was going to start a running shoe company and put everything he had into making it successful. In his memoir Shoe Dog, he recalls an almost ecstatic reaction to this decision,
I was suddenly smiling. Almost laughing. Drenched in sweat, moving as gracefully and effortlessly as I ever had, I saw my Crazy Idea shining up ahead.
Why have I chosen to highlight Phil Knight’s experience?
Primarily because, like Knight, you’re going to face many life-defining decisions on your journey to becoming a successful rebel. In these moments, who, or what, can you turn to for guidance?
Phil Knight followed his heart when choosing his future career. The sensible option would have been to become an accountant or a journalist. He’d have had a good income, been able to support a family and could have avoided the risk of starting a company from scratch. However, despite all these benefits, this path didn’t make him feel alive.
Notice how Knight felt on his morning run, after he’d made the decision to commit to his new business idea. He describes himself as, “suddenly smiling” and, “almost laughing.” The moment seems euphoric.
What could have made him feel this way?
Knight experienced an “inner knowing” about being on the right path and this is why he felt elated. It was his spirit’s way of affirming his choice and that he should proceed with what, until that point, had just been a Crazy Idea.
His life after this moment was far from smooth. He was pushed to breaking point on numerous occasions while trying to establish his running shoe company. However, the decision to follow his heart ultimately led him to become the billionaire owner of one the world’s most popular sports brands.
Such an incredible transformation can only occur when you follow your heart.
Over the course of your life, you might be faced with many important decisions;
On each occasion, there’ll be two voices competing for your attention and offering you guidance. The first of these is your inner voice and the second, society’s.
It’s heart versus head.
How do you know which one to follow?
Leaders and followers, typically, make their major life decisions based on conventional wisdom and are swayed by appeals to logic or what “makes sense.” They’ll be influenced by their parents, teachers, the media, religious leaders, their boss, colleagues and social media. All of these voices will amalgamate into one which they’ll trust over their inner voice (even leaders, in this sense, will act like followers).
Leaders and followers do what’s expected of them, regardless of whether they want to, because they believe,
This thinking might cause them to ignore their true desires when making an important life decision. For example, when choosing a university course, they might select one they have no interest in studying so long as it leads to a clearly defined career path.
When deciding to get married, they might select someone they don’t love (rather than hold out for the real thing) if they’re getting older, facing pressure from their parents and friends to take this step and are concerned about missing their opportunity to marry and have children.
To a degree, this way of making decisions works for the leaders and followers. It helps them avoid difficult existential questions and the disapproval of others. However, the rebel must find an alternative approach.
Rather than listening to society’s voice when making major life decisions, the rebel must heed the call of their inner voice.
This is easy to define yet sometimes hard to hear. It’s your gut instinct, your conscience and what your heart is telling you to do. No matter how uncertain you may be about a decision, it will always be there. Its voice may be muted, drowned out by all the other ones competing for your attention, but if you can develop strong self-awareness, you’ll be able to hear its call.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with listening to external sources and heeding the advice of others. Sometimes it will be wise to do so. However, relying on them to the exclusion of your inner voice might cause you to overlook your life purpose.
Phil Knight used the term “Crazy Idea” to describe his business plan to sell Japanese imported running shoes to the US market.
It didn’t make sense.
He was 24, had a degree, an MBA and had completed a spell in the army. When it came to succeeding in the job market, he was in a strong position. A host of professions and companies would have been more than happy to offer him a job and pay him handsomely for his time. However, instead of accepting the easier path, his heart was telling him to venture into uncharted waters and start a business that, many would consider, was a shot in the dark.
You may be wondering whether your inner voice can be trusted when making major life decisions.
After all, your heart isn’t always rational. Sometimes, it will urge you to do something that appears to be a risk. It might tell you to quit your job and start a business that has no guarantee of success. Or, it could tell you to leave a marriage and put yourself in a position where you’re on your own and at an age where, typically, it’s harder to find a romantic partner. However, just because your heart appears to be placing you in immediate danger, doesn’t mean the wisdom of its guidance won’t be revealed at a later date.
To pre-order a copy, click here and you’ll be taken through to Amazon.
20 years ago (September 2003), I began working as a tennis coach.
At the time, it represented a major step forward in my life.
Prior to that, I’d never enjoyed a single moment of the jobs I’d worked. I spent my entire time working in a sports retail store, as a bartender, at a call centre and working in data entry, clock watching and praying for the end of the day.
This was the first job, I thought, where I was actually going to enjoy the work and get to make a living doing something I was interested in.
What happened next is 20 years of lessons learned, surprises and personal growth.
Making a living from one of my passions was not, in any way, shape or form, what I expected it to be.
I now share this story in the hope that I can help you on your journey.
Here are the five lessons I’ve learned from 20 years as a tennis coach.
Before starting work as a tennis coach, I had the romantic notion that all I needed to do was gain my coaching qualification, find the clients, and everything would be great.
I expected each lesson to be fun and inspiring. This was one of my passions after all, and I’d read that when you align yourself with something you love, special things happen.
The reality of coaching (at the time, I mainly taught groups of 6 to 12 children in one class), though, was very different.
It wasn’t fun. Often, the children behaved badly and the lesson was more about maintaining order than teaching the students anything of value.
Worse still, I discovered that the ethos of the coach I was working with (he initially hired me to work with his coaching company) wasn’t congruent with mine.
For him, tennis coaching was a business and although he did his best to ensure the lessons were run well, the concept of developing outstanding tennis players was secondary to making money.
A month into what I thought was going to be a dream job, I started to have doubts.
For a moment, I thought about quitting. I had all these expectations about what making a living from my passion would be like and none of them were being met.
Fortunately, though, I decided to stick it out.
Despite the difficulties I had in maintaining discipline, and the coaching ethos not being what I imagined it would be, I had one thing going in my favour.
While on court, I was in charge. I had the autonomy to make the work what I wanted it to be.
This took a long time. I had to learn about disciplining children and improve my coaching skills. However, with the passing of the years, I was able to fight for less children in my class and ensure that we were working towards a motivating goal (playing in team competitions and coaching the most talented kids to work their way up the junior rankings).
Eventually, I made the work more rewarding and enjoyable. However, the process taught me an important lesson.
No matter how passionate you may think you are about a certain job, or role, you never know what it’s going to be like. The idea and the reality are often very different. However, this doesn’t mean you’re without scope to mould your passion into what you want it to be.
Henry David Thoreau once said, “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” This also applies to making a living from your passion.
I’ve never done any further qualifications than my initial, entry level course to become a tennis coach.
Why?
Because I’ve never needed to.
This progression is slightly unusual for a tennis coach with only the standard level of qualification (there are two higher levels which many coaches in my position will take). However, my reasoning for never gaining these qualifications is that they will take up A LOT of my time and money while failing to turn me into a better coach.
I’m not a big fan of qualifications. By and large, I view them as box ticking exercises.
I know a few people with MBAs and Masters Degrees who spent a lot of time and money gaining these qualifications but never really furthered their careers after attaining them.
What’s the point?
You can learn whatever you need to learn when on the job, by taking smaller, one day or weekend courses and staying up to date with the latest trends and techniques in your industry with online content or a mastermind group of fellow professionals.
Years of desire to learn and improve is what turned me into a good tennis coach, not the letters after my name.
Occasionally, you don’t even need qualifications!
You might remember Lionel Logue, the Australian speech therapist whose true story came to prominence through the Oscar winning film, The King’s Speech. After many professionals with numerous qualifications had attempted to cure King George VI of his stutter and failed, Logue was recruited in the hope his unconventional methods might work.
Amazingly, they did. The King found his voice and was transformed in his ability to perform his royal duties. However, Logue was self-taught and didn’t have a qualification to his name (apart from the most important one – his experience).
Making a living from your passion is not the same as earning money through a conventional career. Often, there’s no guarantee that you’ll make any money at all.
This level of uncertainty is incredibly testing. Tony Robbins lists “certainty” as one of our 6 essential human needs. To live anxiety free, most people need to know when the next paycheque is coming and what their schedule will look like the next week.
Making a living from your passion doesn’t always afford you that luxury.
This was especially true with tennis coaching.
I’ve had to deal with bad weather forcing me to cancel lessons (I live in England), client turnover when the children inevitably change schools or go to university and the unnerving initial challenge of building a big enough client base to support me.
Initially, this lack of certainty messed with my head. I couldn’t tell whether I’d still be a tennis coach 8 months after I’d started. However, as I got used living without guarantees, something amazing happened.
I started developing the unconscious belief that I’d always be provided for.
Even if there was bad weather, and I’d miss a week’s worth of work, I believed I’d make it up when the sun came out. Even when I branched out on my own, taking the risk to set up my own coaching business after 7 years of working for someone else, I believed everything would work out.
And, amazingly, it did.
By embracing uncertainty and believing I’d always be provided for, it felt like I got into the flow of abundance.
Perhaps it had something to do with living in a more resourceful state.
Because I wasn’t worried about where the next client was coming from, I got on with my job, taught my lessons with enthusiasm, and this enabled me to keep the clients I had and attract new ones either through recommendations or people being impressed with my work.
Or, perhaps there’s a lot of demand for tennis coaching in my area and anyone doing a half way decent job can get enough clients.
Whatever the case, as someone looking to make a living from their passion, I’d advise you to embrace uncertainty.
After 7 years of working with another tennis coach, I decided it was time I branched out.
For a couple of years, I’d been applying for head coach positions at other tennis clubs but hadn’t been successful. So, I hatched a plan to operate independently at one of the venues I’d been working at for the last 7 years.
Of course, this plan wasn’t without risk because it brought me into conflict with the tennis coach who I’d been working with since I qualified.
Despite him never working at these tennis courts (3 of them attached to an LA Fitness gym) and me having done the heavy lifting of running and growing a thriving holiday tennis course programme there, he still very much considered it HIS venue.
Fortunately, though, the managers of the LA Fitness didn’t. They were pissed off with him never paying his rent on time and owing them over £600 in fees. As a result, they were more than happy to strike a new deal with me, allowing me to operate independently at the venue.
To say my former boss was mad about this move was an understatement.
I thought if we met face to face, a fight would have ensued.
I received a couple of abusive phone calls, laced with expletives and I was also threatened with legal action (although on what grounds I’m not sure as I wasn’t breaking any law).
It was an unpleasant experience. However, it had to be done.
On the one hand, I was destroying any friendship I had with the tennis coach who gave me my first job (and that didn’t feel good).
On the other hand, this was a huge opportunity for my advancement (more money, greater freedom and autonomy).
Although part of me liked this man, it was undeniable that he was arrogant, egotistical, a habitual late payer and regularly made a point of letting the coaches who worked for him know who was boss.
In some ways, he got what he deserved.
In some ways, it was a ruthless move on my behalf.
Wherever you lie on assessing whether my decision was ethical, what’s undeniable was that it was difficult.
I expect you’ll be faced with decisions of a similar magnitude on your journey to making a living from your passion.
When you are, understand that it’s ok to be a little ruthless. I don’t regret my decision.
It had to be done so I could continue to grow. That’s the most important point. So long as you’re not REALLY harming another person (my takeover only cost my former boss 10% to 15% of a substantial income), it’s ok to put yourself first.
You probably know me as a writer (perhaps you didn’t even know I worked as a tennis coach and hypnotherapist – and still do).
Writing is my main passion. My life goal is to sell a million copies of the books I write.
However, my journey to making a living from the work that inspires me didn’t begin with writing.
Back in 2003, fresh out of university, I had a plan. I would use jobs that I liked (tennis coaching and hypnotherapy) to support myself while I created a career that I loved (writing and being a speaker).
I created this plan because I believe, and still do, that working just to make money equates to a dull and soulless life. Your work has to be meaningful and enjoyable otherwise you’re wasting your talents and potential (no matter how much money you make).
Ironically, this logic also applies to lesser passions getting in the way of your ultimate goal. For many years, I’ve been guilty of not pushing hard enough with my writing because I’ve had my tennis coaching to fall back on.
Because, for the most part, I enjoy the work, there’s a lack of urgency to succeed as a writer.
You must be aware of this if you’re following a similar approach.
Don’t get too comfortable. Keep your eyes on the prize and know when it’s time to risk something you like for something you love.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
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The Alchemist was first published in 1988.
Since then, it’s sold over 65 million copies and become the best-selling self-help/spirituality book of all-time (excluding religious texts like The Bible).
Furthermore, it is THE most translated book in the world by a living author, with versions available to read in 74 different languages.
The author, Paulo Coelho, has lived a life worthy of the adventures of the book’s main character, Santiago.
Born in Brazil in 1947, he was raised in a strict Catholic family and attended a school run by Jesuits.
He rebelled against this upbringing, presumably rejecting the path his parents wished him to pursue. Shockingly, this resulted in him being committed to a mental asylum by them on three separate occasions.
Once an adult, further clashes with authority ensued. Instead of pursuing the law degree for which he’d enrolled, he left university and started writing song lyrics for Brazilian musicians.
These songs were political in nature, protesting the country’s military rule. As a result, he was jailed on three separate occasions and, while imprisoned, tortured by the guards.
Despite this treatment, Coelho never stopped dreaming. Once freed, he experienced a spiritual awakening while walking the famous Camino trail in northern Spain.
After this, he committed to his dream of becoming a writer and, one year later, penned his masterpiece.
Paulo Coelho knows both about the importance of pursuing your dreams and how to achieve them.
The subtitle of The Alchemist is “A Fable About Following Your Dreams” and many people (including Bill Clinton and Julia Roberts) cite it as an influential work. However, the focus of this blog post is less on the book itself, and more on a brief 4-page prelude to the main work which comes included with the 2012 edition.
In this essay, Coelho offers insights into the subject he’s most qualified to write on – the pursuit, and achievement, of one’s dreams.
He claims there are only 4 obstacles to be concerned with when taking on this seemingly monumental challenge.
Below, I will break each one of these down, offering further insights, and explaining why the life of your dreams could be within your grasp.
Coelho writes, “we are told from childhood onwards that everything we want to do is impossible.” As a result of hearing this from parents, teachers, the media, friends, our peer group, work colleagues, bosses and religious leaders, “There comes a time when our personal calling is so deeply buried in our soul as to be invisible.”
We live in a system that encourages mediocrity.
One of the life lessons we’re taught from our teenage years is that dreams rarely come true.
As a result, it’s considered a far safer route to study hard in school, get a place at university and then secure a well-paid job after graduation.
At least this way you’ll live a comfortable and secure life. Barring an unforeseen accident or illness, nothing much will go wrong.
However, what happens if a “normal life’ isn’t good enough for you? What happens if you can still hear your “personal calling” and hold out the smallest hope that it’s more than just a fantasy?
If this is the case then you must unplug from the system.
Stop listening to, and avoid, the people who tell you your dream is impossible to achieve. Remember, what they’re telling you is an outright lie.
Unless your dream is to be the first human to make contact with an alien species, it’s likely that whatever you want to do, no matter how outrageous it may sound to others, has been done before.
THEREFORE IT’S NOT IMPOSSIBLE.
Realise this and understand that it can be done. Then, if possible, connect with the people who have achieved what you’re aiming to do.
You’ll benefit from their perspective, and knowledge, and this should get you a quarter of the way to your destination.
Although there are similarities, obstacle two is different to the first. It’s more direct, involving the people around you – the ones who are closest to you – and the influence they can have over your decisions.
We all need connection. However, what happens when our need for connection requires that we play small and ignore our need for exploration, expression and meaning?
It’s a difficult situation to be in. Coelho writes, “We know what we want to do, but are afraid of hurting those around us by abandoning everything in order to pursue our dream.”
For fear of being called selfish and for fear of being isolated and alone, we’ll sacrifice our dreams so we can have harmony at home.
But how long will this harmony last?
Sure, your spouse, parents and kids may feel better but how are you going to cope with living half a life?
Fortunately, Coelho has a solution.
He flips the situation on its head by writing that love shouldn’t stop you from pursuing your dreams but, instead, propel you towards them.
If someone truly loves you, they want you to be happy. Therefore, if some of that happiness is dependent on you exploring your personal calling then they’ll support you on your journey.
Of course, in every relationship there’s a degree of compromise involved. However, try to think of ways to let the people you love know that you pursuing your dreams is a win-win for everyone.
It’s a great example to your kids, it could lead to some very proud parents and your spouse gets to enjoy the best version of you.
If you’re considering, or are already, following your dreams, there’s something you must understand.
The path you walk is different to 99% of the population. Although you have a chance to enjoy life’s greatest rewards, you’re also confronting life’s greatest challenges. As a result, it’s more than likely you’ll experience some heart breaking failures.
Coelho writes, “We who fight for our dream suffer far more when it doesn’t work out, because we cannot fall back on the old excuse, ‘Oh, well, I didn’t really want it anyway.'”
You must face the pain of putting everything on the line and still failing. However, if you can get through this, victory is assured.
Coelho writes, “The secret of life, though, is to fall seven times and to get back up eight times.”
He also mentions that ignoring your dreams carries its own form of suffering. This is more subtle and, “eats away at our soul,” eventually becoming impossible to deal with in older age.
So, don’t allow the fear of failure or the potential for suffering to deter you from pursuing your dreams. These are inevitable experiences and are actually a key part of the process to becoming successful.
Embrace them and understand that you CAN overcome any obstacle.
You are now three-quarters of the way towards living the life of your dreams. However, the final obstacle you face is, perhaps, the hardest to understand.
Coelho writes, “The mere possibility of getting what we want fills the soul of the ordinary person with guilt. We look around at all those who have failed to get what they want and feel that we do not deserve to get what we want either.”
Humans are social animals. We like to feel connected to others. Therefore, when faced with the prospect of succeeding on a level that far exceeds anyone we know, we fear isolation.
Coelho writes, “I have known a lot of people who, when their personal calling was within their grasp, went on to commit a series of stupid mistakes and never reached their goal when it was only a step away.”
Why?
The sickness of mind known as “playing small.”
We falsely assume we’re being virtuous if we stay like everyone else. As Coelho writes, there’s a, “saintly aura” about, “renouncing joy and conquest.” Society promotes the false narrative that the best people are the ordinary ones who work hard, keep their heads down and give to others.
While there is merit in this approach, it ignores our need to be inspired, realise our potential and live life to the fullest.
These needs can only be met if we have examples of dream achievers to emulate.
Ironically, we don’t always serve others by playing small so they can escape feeling inadequate. Instead, sometimes the best way to serve others is to let our light shine so they have permission to do the same (to paraphrase Marianne Williamson).
So, don’t for a second feel guilty about your success.
You living your dreams can ONLY be a good thing for those around you and the world at large.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
First, the numbers.
Arnold Schwarzenegger has won 7 Mr. Olympia titles (the most coveted title in bodybuilding).
Movies that Arnold has acted in (of which there are over 40), have grossed a total $4.5 billion worldwide and, at one time, he was the highest paid actor in Hollywood, commanding $20 to $30 million per movie.
In 2003, despite being born in Austria and only becoming a US citizen in his 30s, Arnold was elected Governor of the state of California and then re-elected in 2006.
His net worth stands at around $450 million.
Arnold Schwarzenegger is one of the most successful people on the planet.
Furthermore, this success HASN’T come to him through luck.
Arnold clearly has a formula. There’s something about his mentality and attitude that has enabled him to succeed in three different disciplines, making him a perfect example to emulate for those desiring extraordinary success.
There are few better resources for this study than the recently released Netflix documentary, Arnold. Over the course of 3, hour-long episodes, Arnold discusses his life story and shares insights into his winning philosophy.
You could watch the documentary (and I thoroughly recommend it – for entertainment purposes as well). However, if you want the cheat sheet on becoming more like Arnold, then just read below.
Here are 7 ways you can emulate Arnold Schwarzenegger and win in life (all material taken from the Netflix documentary).
One of the most frequently repeated themes throughout the documentary is Arnold’s ability to visualise.
In the first episode, while talking about his early years as a bodybuilder, he says,
I saw my career in front of me. I saw myself on that Mr. Universe stage . . . and stand there with the trophy, and flex my muscles and I saw the thousands of people in the theatre screaming, “Arnold! Arnold!” It’s not a fantasy, it’s not a dream . . .you have to have a clear vision. And when you visualise something clearly, you believe 100% you can get there.
The message is clear.
DON’T HAVE A LAZY MIND.
Whether working out, or auditioning for a movie role, Arnold always visualised himself achieving the outcomes he desired. He understood the power of the mind/body connection and so should you.
Use every opportunity you have to visualise yourself succeeding and make note of the mini-goals you achieve along the way (Arnold mentions how, in the Athletik Union Graz – his first gym – he would mark on a blackboard every set he completed while working out).
Arnold doesn’t react like most people when an authority figure tells him he’ll fail. In fact, he seems to take a perverse delight in being told something can’t be done.
In the third episode, he says, “But the more someone says, ‘You can’t,’ or, ‘this is impossible,’ the more excited I get over it.”
Throughout his life, plenty of people have told Arnold “no.” The Austrian Army told him he couldn’t compete in the 1965 Junior Mr. Europe so he went AWOL and won. In the 1970s, Hollywood agents told him that it would be impossible for a 230-pound man with an unpronounceable name, and a thick accent, to ever be a movie star yet he went on to become one of the industry’s leading men.
Who’s telling you “it can’t be done” at the moment?
Irrespective or their power or status, perhaps you SHOULDN’T listen to them.
Arnold had a tough upbringing. He grew up poor and in a sometimes-abusive home.
This led his older brother, Meinhard, to become an alcoholic. Tragically, Meinhard died aged 25 after driving under the influence and crashing into a telephone poll.
While reflecting on this loss Arnold remarks, “The very thing that made me who I am today is the very thing that destroyed him.”
Meinhard was broken by the suffering he endured. For Arnold, it made him train harder at the gym and fight through the misery of being on his own in foreign countries. He rationalised that anything was better than where he came from and this gave him the fire to succeed.
How do you feel about your past? How unpleasant are your present circumstances?
They may, or may have been, incredibly tough. However, you have a choice over how you’re going to interpret these circumstances.
Are they going to be the thing that breaks you? Or, are they going to be motivation for never experiencing something similar again?
In the second episode, Arnold declares, “As soon as my emotions bother my training, I switch them off.”
This seems radical. In today’s world we’re told to express our emotions and feel justified in being outraged and anxious.
Arnold doesn’t agree. He says that,
When you are a person that has always a goal . . .the less time you have to think about, “How do I feel today? Am I depressed today? Do I feel sorry for myself? Have I become a victim? Oh my God, I feel so bad about myself.” I don’t have time for this crap. A lot times it’s people they don’t work enough. If you’re busy all the time, you don’t have time to think about this stuff.
I’ve witnessed hypnotherapy clients of mine become so overwhelmed, and engaged, in their anxieties that it completely shuts them down. And, while Arnold’s approach is a little extreme, there’s something to be said for not allowing your emotions to rule your life.
A focused mind, with a clear and meaningful goal to work towards, is likely two thirds of the cure for prolonged depression and sadness.
Don’t allow yourself to be sabotaged by the vagaries of how you feel.
One of Arnold’s favourite quotes comes from media mogul, Ted Turner, who famously said, “Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell and advertise.”
This is Arnold’s mantra. He was never shy about promoting himself, his movies or campaigning for office. While talking about his movie career he says,
You have to be involved yourself, you have to go in there and say, “here’s why you should see this movie.” It doesn’t matter if the other stars say no because they’re spoiled brats . . . We have to sell everything. No matter what you do in life, you have to sell it.
Arnold makes a great point. Don’t expect your work to sell itself. It probably won’t. Instead, be ready to meet as many people as possible, talk about what you do when appropriate and make your work seem appealing to others.
Arnold highlights one method for doing this during the second episode. He talks about using the schmae (a German word that roughly translates to “bullshit”).
In the 1977 documentary, Pumping Iron, he told the audience that getting a pump at the gym was as satisfying as orgasming during sex. We then see him during the 90’s, bragging about his cigar smoking, claiming he can do it wherever he likes and that he answers to no one.
He’s being brash and outrageous, courting attention yet doing it in a way that’s playful rather than offensive.
Can you do something similar? Can you exaggerate elements of your personality to get people to notice you and your work?
Daniel Zingale, a senior advisor to Arnold while he was Governor of California, was amazed at his capacity to enjoy what was a very serious and demanding role. He noted,
Another big difference between Schwarzenegger and the other governors I’ve known is how much joy he got from the job. And the “happy warrior” approach has a way of lifting up staff and lifting up the state.
It wasn’t just his work as a governor where Arnold exuded positivity. Despite having to put his body through gruelling, sometimes 5-hour long workouts during his 20s, he always had a smile on his face when in the gym.
Arnold insists that work should be fun and remarks, “Most people don’t know that. They worry and they work and they worry and they work. Where’s the fun?”
Can you change your attitude to your work?
Can you either find a way to make it more fun, or connect with the deeper meaning of your job so it’s no longer a chore?
Adopting this mindset can’t help but have an uplifting impact on those around you.
Perhaps the most surprising part of the documentary comes right at the end when Arnold remarks, “You can call me Arnie, you can call me snitzy, you can call me kraut, but don’t call me a self-made man, because I’m not.”
This is an astonishing revelation from someone who’s thought of as the uber example of a self-made man. However, as Arnold reels off a long list of people who’ve contributed to his success, you understand this status is a myth.
You then discover that one of Arnold’s greatest strengths is his ability to work with anyone.
While governor of California, he hired Sarah Kennedy (a Democrat) to work as his Chief of Staff (Arnold is a Republican). He also formed an allegiance with Democrat RFK Jr.
Arnold brings people together and doesn’t understand the concept of having enemies.
What about you?
Are you holding onto grudges, or prejudices, that are preventing you from working with people who could be significant to your success?
Let them go.
If Arnold, supposedly a man with one of the largest egos on the planet, can set aside petty differences for the greater good, then so can you.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
(Image Gage Skidmore flickr.com)
I first read Robert Greene’s 48 Laws Of Power back in 2021. After reading it, I was, in equal parts, fascinated and shocked.
There’s no doubt that Greene has written a masterpiece. Deep thought and extensive research has gone into this work. Robert Green’s insights into what it takes to attain power are razor sharp, revealing how famous figures from the past were able to climb the greasy ladder and exert their influence on those beneath them.
But so what?
Does possessing power equate to living a good life or becoming a good person?
Probably not.
Instead of making friends, you’ll acquire people you can use. Instead of living a carefree, happy life, you’ll constantly be looking over your shoulder and worrying about whether someone is going to take your spot.
That was my initial opinion of the 48 Laws Of Power. However, with time, a deeper appreciation of the book has grown.
I’m now able to separate some of the more morally questionable laws from the outstanding insights into human nature.
Furthermore, after dipping back into the book for the second time, I’ve noticed how useful it is for creators (writers, youtubers, entrepreneurs, coaches, singers, musicians, influencers) who are aiming to build an audience for their work.
There are 4 laws in particular, which I’ll reveal and explain below, that provide you with all the information you need to grow your following to the level where you can get paid to do the work you love.
Study them carefully and incorporate them into your business and life.
Stand out. Make yourself a magnet for attention by appearing larger, more colourful, more mysterious than the bland and timid masses.
– Robert Greene
Robert Greene believes there’s no such thing as bad publicity. Any kind of attention, whether negative or positive, is better than being ignored.
To make this point, he uses the example of 19th century showman PT Barnum. Barnum used to write scathing, anonymous attacks on his own circus show and then submit them to the local papers.
Why?
Barnum understood the importance of getting attention. Even if his circus was being decried, IT WAS IN THE PAPER. That’s all that mattered. People’s curiosity would be piqued by reports of the outrageous acts and want to see if the show was as crass as it was portrayed.
How can YOU gain attention for your books, music, YouTube channel, podcast or product?
Greene offers an interesting insight.
He suggests that something about your style of dress, or a personality quirk, or a catchphrase, should be affected and enhanced.
Some quick examples spring to mind.
The thought of copying one of these approaches may seem daunting but that’s the point. As Greene writes, you have to appear larger and more colourful than the “bland and timid masses.”
Of course, don’t do this in a cringey way. You’re not going to don an eye patch unless you run YouTube channel that focuses on 17th century pirates.
Instead, listen to Greene’s guidance,
Society craves larger than life figures, people who stand above the general mediocrity. Never be afraid, then, of the qualities that set you apart and draw attention to you.
Adherence to this law is about having the courage to be yourself. In a society where we’re always being told to play it safe and “fit in,” you must be brave enough to let the world see who you really are.
Accentuate your quirks. Give free reign to your individuality through your dress, the things you say and the way you behave. Not only will you gain attention, you’ll enjoy the freedom gained from being authentic.
Robert Greene points out that, “In your quest for power, you will constantly find yourself in the position of asking for help from those more powerful than you.”
Very few, if any, people make it on their own. Don’t delude yourself into thinking you’ll be the exception.
It’s more than likely you’ll need to build relationships with various kingmakers who can give you access to a wider audience.
Greene warns against appealing to a kingmaker’s sense of justice, expecting them to help because of the righteousness of your cause.
They don’t care about how hard you’ve tried or how many years you’ve put into your project. Instead, they want to know what you can do for them.
Dale Carnegie echoes this sentiment in his book, How To Win Friends and Influence People. Principle 3 states, “Arouse in the other person an eager want.”
When approaching or making an offer to a kingmaker, think about how you can help them. How are THEY going to benefit by what you have to offer?
Apply this law to your marketing as well.
Your website, your leaflets and the landing pages for the products you’re selling, should all be about how you can help your customer and clients meet their needs.
People don’t want to believe that years and years of hard work and effort is the answer to their problems. Instead, they want to be sold a fantasy.
Although all of these promises are see through, they often seduce audiences because most people want to avoid the harsh realities of life.
Pay attention to this flaw in human nature and start to think about what fantasy you can offer.
All of these fantasies carry a tremendous appeal. People will be drawn to them and won’t question their, somewhat, dubious claims because they’re so desperate to believe that such an outcome could be true.
Furthermore, a fantasy doesn’t have to be a lie. Sure, it has to be fantastical to seduce an audience but you can attempt to deliver on your promises as best you can.
Offer the stars and people might just settle for a trip into space.
This law is about self-belief.
Do you believe you’re destined for something amazing? Can you look in the mirror and see greatness?
Robert Greene uses the example of Christopher Columbus to highlight the importance of acting like a king.
He points out that Columbus knew very little about navigation, couldn’t work a quadrant and had never led a group of men. Furthermore, when appealing to the queen of Spain for the funds to discover a quicker trade route to India by travelling west, his proposal had no clear plan for achieving the objective. However, what he did have was a cast iron belief in himself and his mission, so much so he fabricated an aristocratic lineage in order to impress the royal court of Spain.
Bemused by Columbus’s bearing, Queen Isabella rationalised that there must be something about this man, and his bold claims, and agreed to fund his expedition. The rest is history.
Robert Greene instructs you to be, “overcome by your self-belief.”
Have no doubt in your mind that you are the person you say you are and can do the things you claim. Let it radiate out of you. Be so convinced that people can’t help but be won over.
Living with this level of self-belief plays a psychological trick on the people around you. Because you set such a high price on yourself, people will rationalise that you must have a reason for being so confident. As a result, they’ll follow you and purchase your products and services.
Act like a King to be treated like one!
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
(Image taken from Goodreads)
Steven Covey, author of 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, once said,
“Depending on what they are, our habits will either make us or break us. We become what we repeatedly do.”
This blog post will challenge you to look into the minutia of your day and question how you spend your time. Then, it will ask for just an hour and a half in implementing 7 simple habits that have the potential to create the life of your dreams.
Is that too much time to ask for?
Is living life on your own terms, getting to do the work you love and spending time with the people you love, worth sacrificing 90 minutes a day for?
I’m sure it is.
Let’s begin.
The following 7 habits all adhere to one simple rule. The actions they require you to take are small enough that you can repeat them EVERY day without impinging on the rest of your life.
Anything extra and life would make these habits too difficult to maintain. You might stick to them for a week but, sooner or later, you’d get busy at work, something would happen with the kids or you’d have a weekend away and everything would be thrown out of sync. After that, you’d lose momentum, struggle to get back into the routine and, ultimately, give up.
That’s why I value DOING LESS when it comes to daily habits.
Get the basics done EVERY SINGLE DAY, build momentum and, with time, watch your life change.
Bear this in mind as you read through the list below. The following 7 actions should become so routine you’re able to maintain them even when taking a vacation.
This should be the first thing you do upon gaining your senses.
Lie in bed, close your eyes and speak your goals out loud.
Here are some of mine;
TIP: When repeating these goals, match each one with a vision in your mind. For example, when I repeat 1 million copies sold, I imagine myself celebrating with my arms held aloft.
Also, repeat your goals three times over.
Both the repetition and the visualisation make these goals more believable to your subconscious mind. Their achievement seems REAL and your subconscious will respond with the ideas, and chance encounters, that’ll ensure you reach your destination.
Repeat Habit 1 just before falling asleep at night.
It sounds like such a simple thing and I’m sure there’s a good chance you already do it, but there’s power in making your first action of the day productive.
Admiral William McRaven writes about this in his book, Make your Bed. The military are big on bed tidiness and for good reason.
You must start the day as you mean to go on.
Making your bed is the foundation for the tasks you’re going to complete later in the day. Furthermore, it gets you out of bed BEFORE you check your phone (reducing your chances of starting your day in the wrong way).
My advice is to do this as early as possible. If a day job prevents you from completing it in the morning then do the work as soon as you return home. Or, you could try doing 30 minutes before work and then 30 minutes after.
Doing this every single day, without fail, is how you become an expert in a field. Then, once you’re an expert, you can monetise your passion.
Let’s say your passion is writing. You want to monetize your blog or get paid to write articles on Medium.
At the modest rate of writing 400 words per hour, you would complete a new article every 4 days (1500 words is a typical sized blog post although you could go shorter). By the end of the month, you’d have churned out 6 or 7 new compositions.
Do that for a year or two or even three, and something amazing will happen.
First, your writing will improve. Second, you’ll have a trove of useful content with the potential to attract a sizeable audience. Finally, because you’re being consistent and releasing material on a weekly basis, people will be inclined to follow and pay you.
Of course, you might not be passionate about writing and that’s fine. Whatever your vehicle for doing the work you love, commit an hour to it every day.
It doesn’t matter when you complete this habit. It could be lunchtime, after work or before bed.
The reason it must be a NON-FICTION book is because this habit is about learning (not entertainment). Of course, there’s nothing wrong with reading fiction but I suggest you save that for bedtime when you want to unwind.
Pick a genre you’re keen to learn about. Personal development is a great place to start but you could also educate yourself on finance, property, history or art.
I’m a medium paced reader and I tend to read 10 pages in 15 minutes. At this rate, I complete a 300-page book (a typical size for non-fiction) in 30 days.
This means that my daily 15 minute reading habit (which is so easy to maintain), enables me to complete 12 books over the course of a year. I can then use the knowledge I’ve acquired through this reading to improve my business and life.
TIP: Highlight the important sections from your non-fiction book for future reference.
Take a break from whatever it is you might be doing and, preferable, find somewhere in nature (a garden or a park will suffice) to sit down and relax.
During these 10 minutes of quiet time, you can either focus on your surroundings or close your eyes.
If you opt to close your eyes, you could then notice your breathing, clear your mind or visualise yourself being successful (or a combination of all three).
Noticing your breathing is a great way of relaxing and recharging. Furthermore, it allows you to experience the benefits of meditation because, when connected to your breathing, you can’t be distracted by your thoughts.
Clearing your mind is another way to meditate. If you haven’t had much practise, you might struggle at first. Thoughts about what you’re eating for dinner later, an argument you had with your girlfriend or boyfriend or chores you need to complete, might disturb your inner peace. Just let them pass through and keep emptying your mind of any disturbances. Eventually you’ll reach a state of calm.
Visualising success is an extension of Habit 1. Think about one of your important life goals and imagine yourself achieving it. Alongside the visualisation, see if you can capture some of the joyful/excited emotions you’ll feel when it comes true.
Whatever you do during your 10 minutes of silence, remember that this is probably the most important part of your day.
Once complete, you’ll feel refreshed. Furthermore, through meditation and visualisation, you’re mastering skills that’ll enable you to live in the now and prime your subconscious for success.
At the risking of sounding like the government, or your parents, try to make sure you eat a minimum level of these nutrient rich foods each day.
Not only is it going to improve your health but sticking to this habit will stop you from eating junk food. (Take away pizza or fish and chips aren’t going to cut it if it’s approaching dinner time and you haven’t yet eaten your 5 a day.)
Eating 5 a day also helps you bypass the willpower problem when dieting or seeking to eat a healthier diet.
It’s very hard to stick to the promise of saying, “I won’t eat chocolate or I won’t eat X.” This is because your subconscious still hears the word “chocolate” or whatever treat it is you enjoy. However, if you focus on something else – eating more fruit and vegetables – then your attention is focused elsewhere and unhealthy foods become easier to resist.
This habit has multiple benefits.
First, it assists sleep. By preventing you from scrolling through your phone while in bed, you negate the possibility of staying awake 30 minutes longer than you intended.
This makes a difference to how fresh you’ll feel the next day.
Second, your subconscious is at its most fertile before going to bed. It’s one of the best times to think about how you want your life to be. You’ll go deeper into the emotion of your desired life and this will make your imaginings real to your subconscious.
TIP: If you like listening to music or reading before going to bed, do so on a device separate to your phone. It’s harder to scroll through social media, or your messages, on a Kindle or laptop.
Following these 7 daily habits will create the life of your dreams.
Implement them today.
Small changes CAN make a big difference.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
(image used courtesy of Greta Egan’s photostream on flickr.com)