What’s this?

Now, you may give the obvious answer which is an iPhone X but that’s not what I’m talking about.
You may also say that it’s a communication device – a mobile phone – but that’s not the point I want to make either.
While the above object is both of those things it’s also something far worse.
What you see in the picture is a 5.8 inch dream killer.
Yes, this device has the power to destroy all of your dreams and goals.
How?
The first way your phone kills your dreams is by taking time away from your important projects.
How much time do you spend on your phone every day?
If you have an iPhone, you should receive a notification on a Monday morning for your average daily screen time for the previous week.
Mine was 3 hours 28 minutes.

Yours might be less or it might be more. Perhaps you spend an average of 6 hours a day on your phone – that’s almost half your productive hours in a day.
What would happen if you were to take 2 of those 6 hours away from your phone and commit them to a project you’re passionate about?
That would add up to 14 hours a week and 728 hours over a year.
Imagine what you could do with 728 hours committed to 1 objective.
Whatever you did, you could significantly improve the quality of your life by taking 2 hours a day away from your phone and putting it into your passion.
Another way to think of this is that your mobile phone is stealing your time and, potentially, chaining you to a life of economic servitude because you don’t have the power or skills to do anything else.
The second way your phone addiction is killing your dreams is by polluting your mind.
You may say to me, “Wait Joe, most of the time I’m on my phone, I’m not staring at a screen. I’m doing something productive or enjoyable like listening to a podcast or music.”
Of course, this seems like a fair point, and there’s nothing wrong with doing either of those things in moderation but there’s something important you need to remember.
What’s your most powerful tool for creating the life of your dreams?
It’s not a mentor, it’s not your network and it’s not that $2000 course some coach or influencer is trying to sell you.
Instead, it’s your mind.
Your ability to focus your thoughts on an objective is the most powerful tool you possess to make your dreams come true.
What’s happening to you for the 6 hours a day you’re spending on your phone?
All of your mental power and energy is being dispersed. It’s not being harnessed and focused on an objective. Instead, it’s jumping from one information stream to another, from Tik Tok to the Joe Rogan Experience, from cat videos to Drake.
What happens as a result of this distraction?
You remain weak. You never develop the laser focus needed to succeed at something that could potentially make you financially free or increase your happiness or health.
So, what’s the solution?
Overcoming your mobile phone addiction through willpower probably isn’t going to work.
Don’t think you can resist the temptation to pick up your phone and start scrolling when it’s by your side. Remember, some very intelligent people have designed mobile phones to be highly addictive.
So, instead, what you’ve got to do is make it difficult to access your phone.
DO EVERYTHING YOU CAN TO SEPARATE YOURSELF FROM YOUR PHONE.
This way, on that short trip to the shops to buy food, you’ll be able to imagine yourself living your ideal life. Likewise, in between sets at the gym, you’ll be able to visualise yourself achieving an important goal.
Added to this, all the time you waste scrolling through social media apps will be claimed back. Now, you can do some serious work on an important project.
Make no mistake, mobile phones are dream killers.
And, of course, some smart arse might comment, “I run my business on my phone, why would I want to reduce my screen time?”
Fair enough but just make sure you’re not using your mobile phone any more than is absolutely necessary.
It will dilute your focus and it’ll take your time away. And for what?
So you can keep up to date with your favourite influencer who doesn’t give a damn about you? Or, so you can watch some attention seekers do a stupid dance on Tik Tok?
You won’t reach the end of your life and regret not spending enough time on your phone!!!
(If you want to watch the video version of this blog post, click here).
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
Photo by Mika Baumeister on Unsplash
Photo by Todd Jiang on Unsplash
At the beginning of 2022, I set myself 15 goals. It was going to be the year that I wrote two books and published one, all while purchasing a rental property and securing tenants.
The outcome?
I only achieved 4 of my 15 goals.
By the beginning of October this year, I could tell something was going wrong. I’d already failed with a few of my goals and was way off target with most of the remaining ones.
Frustrated, I knew something had to change.
Salvaging 2022 wasn’t possible but I wanted to set up a system that helped me finish the year strong and be prepared for the best ever 2023.
Browsing through some of my old notes, I came across a quote which enlightened me on the error of my ways and led me to a discovery that has dramatically changed my approach to goal setting (and produced some dramatic results).
While re-reading my notes on Man’s Search for Meaning, I saw the following passage from author and psychiatrist, Victor Frankl,
Don’t aim at success – the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side-effect of one’s dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one’s surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge.
This may not seem like your typical goal-setting advice but it lit a switch in my mind.
With all of my previous goals, I’d been aiming at success. I was thinking about how much I could achieve in a year and wanting to set massive targets which, I believed, would inspire me into action. However, setting my goals in this way actually achieved the opposite.
Instead of inspiring me, they left me overwhelmed. Instead of enabling me to achieve, they left me confused.
So, I decided to rip up my previous playbook and start setting goals according to a completely different set of principles.
Here’s what I did . . .
Following Frankl’s advice, I needed to stop aiming at success.
This meant that goals based on book sales, or making a certain amount of money, had to go. They were going to lead me to focus on the outcome and overlook my present situation.
Instead, I had to get lost in my work. I had to allow the passion I feel for inspiring people to break free from the system to guide my efforts without thought to what I might achieve.
In theory, this sounded great. However, I could tell there was a possibility I might be unfocused and jump from one project to another if I followed this approach.
At this point, I remembered another influential book and further refined my goal-setting approach.
Gary Keller’s, The ONE Thing, teaches the reader to focus their energy and attention. He asks you to answer one key question, “What’s the ONE Thing I can do such that by doing it everything else will be easier or unnecessary?”
Pondering this question forced me to apply focus to my passion. Instead of 10 or 15 goals, I had to select one important goal for 2023 that, through achieving it, was going to have the greatest impact on my business and life.
Of course, selecting a certain number of book sales was out of the question (for two reasons).
Therefore, I decided to make my “one thing” a goal that was 99% within my power to achieve (more on this to come).
With this established, I then had to work backwards from my goal and figure out all of the steps in the road that would enable me to get there.
Let’s explore how this is achieved.
My main goal for 2023 is writing and having my 5th book ready to publish (I’m just putting the finishing touches on my 4th).
Here’s how to choose yours and what you should do after that.
Decide upon your main goal for the year.
The criteria for selecting your yearly goal for 2023 are as follows;
Once you’ve decided upon this goal, starting January 1st (or whenever it is you read this blog post), set one goal for the month (and every month after that).
The criteria for choosing these monthly goals are as follows;
Once you’ve decided upon your goal for January, begin setting your goal for the first week of January.
The criteria for choosing weekly goals are as follows;
Once you’ve decided upon your goal for the week, select your goal for each and every day of that week.
The criteria for setting daily goals are as follows;
And there you have it. A goal-setting approach that will increase your motivation, momentum and focus.
If there’s any confusion about how to apply it to your life, here’s the simple version.
Since I’ve adopted this approach (October 2022), I’ve over doubled my productivity. My hope is that it’ll do the same for you (and if you’re struggling to apply any of the points then please let me know in the comments section below and I’ll be happy to help).
Before I go, it’s worth mentioning one last point. If you were to ask me the secret to making this approach work, I would respond that you shouldn’t demand too much of yourself when setting your yearly, monthly, weekly and daily goals.
Elon Musk claimed that the Falcon 1 – Space X’s first ever rocket – would successfully launch and reach orbit by 2003 (Space X was founded in 2002). It took until September of 2008 for this goal to be realised.
Our major goals ALWAYS take longer to achieve than we think.
Therefore, set a series of achievable goals, get used to meeting them every day, week, month and year, and watch your motivation and momentum soar.
Good luck!
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
There are two types of people in this world.
Winners and losers.
Sorry to be so blunt but, at the end of the day, you either get your life exactly where you want it to be or you complain, makes excuses and accept that your life can never be the way you want.
Is being a winner the most important thing in the world?
No. It’s more important that you’re a good person. But why can’t you be a good person and a winner?
If I had to pull a number out of thin air, I would say 90% of people are losers and 10% are winners. Being a winner certainly isn’t common. Most people will have one, or more, areas of their life which aren’t the way they want.
It’s ok to be honest about this. It’s alright to admit that, in some areas of your life, you’re a loser.
I was a loser for 90% of my life. It’s only recently I’ve turned a corner and changed my mindset (more on this later).
That’s why I can write with authority on this subject. I know the loser’s mindset. I’m aware of all the things you’ll tell yourself that, unwittingly, prevent you from winning.
Right now, I’m going to share them with you.
Then, I’m going to show you how to win.
This is, by far, the most important part of transforming yourself from loser to winner. You have to stop thinking, and talking, like a loser.
Every time a loser experiences a setback, or a failure, they’ll tell themselves one of these 5 things.
Let’s explore each one of these lies in a more detail.
This lie can arise from low self-esteem or a perverse sense of morality (when so many people are poor, struggling, or losing in life, it’s not right that I should be the one winning). Whatever the cause, this thought must be expunged from your mind. Winning, if done fairly and without exploiting others, is good for everyone because it increases the amount of positivity in the world.
Furthermore, there’s the potential for greatness within every single one of us. You are worthy. It’s the system that makes you doubt your light.
2. The world is against me
When I first published my book, back in 2012, it took over 6 weeks to sell a single copy outside my immediate family. I was devastated. For four years, I’d worked on this project and now it had failed. However, it was a good book (I was certain of that), so I couldn’t figure out why it wasn’t selling.
My ridiculous conclusion? The world was against me. Something in the universe, Amazon’s algorithm or people’s lack of good sense, was holding me back.
Of course, it couldn’t have been my lack of knowledge regarding marketing or my naivety about the online content creating space. Oh no, in my loser mind it had to be because the world was against me.
If you ever find yourself thinking similar thoughts, stop. The world isn’t for, or against, anyone. It just is.
3. Second place is good enough
There are times when a growth mindset is useful. Furthermore, it’s ok if you don’t win every time. Sometimes, you can win just by learning an important lesson and improving. However, there will be other times, with your most important goals, when only first place will do.
Learn to identify these occasions and refuse to settle for anything less than total victory.
4. It wasn’t meant to be
If the universe never meant for you to have something, then it wouldn’t have given you the desire in the first place. The universe wants you to have the life of your dreams. However, it’s not going to give it to you.
Therein lies the distinction you need to understand. Everything you achieve in this life; you are going to have to make it happen. There is no “meant to be.” Instead, there’s just what you want and what you’re prepared to do to get it.
5. My goal isn’t possible
History is littered with unachievable goals that, eventually, occurred. Nelson Mandela once said, “It always seems impossible until it’s done.” He, alongside his ANC comrades, overthrew an entire political system.
Don’t tell me (and especially, yourself) that your dream of being a five figure a month coach, or making a living from your music, is impossible.
If you ever find yourself repeating, or believing, any of these 5 lies then change your thoughts. Winners don’t think this way.
Here’s what they do instead.
I use the word “must” deliberately. This is something you can’t leave this earth without doing. It may be something as simple as having children. Perhaps it’s selling a million copies of your books. Maybe it’s climbing Mount Everest.
The specifics of your goal aren’t important. All that matters is that it’s important to you. Something about what the goal will force you to do, or become, is so significant to your life journey, and development, that to not get there would equate to a wasted, or failed, life.
This goal should be easily quantifiable. You should be able to tell a friend, in one sentence, exactly what you want to achieve and be clearly understood.
Once you have this all-important goal, proceed to step 3.
What does this mean?
You must develop total certainty in the knowledge you’ll achieve your goal. Make a decision that it’s going to happen.
Then, no matter what you’re faced with along your journey, remain steadfast in your certainty. Never deviate from the thought you’re going to win.
Comply with these 3 steps and something incredible will happen. You’ll keep getting more out of yourself (learning, improving and getting mentally stronger) until you achieve your goal and become a winner.
Last year, I experienced my own loser to winner transformation.
It happened on a tennis court, when I was playing in the final of an ITF masters tournament in London.

My opponent had beaten me on 3 previous occasions. I hadn’t defeated him once. However, despite this unfavourable head-to-head, I knew this was my best chance to win.
As the match began, my confidence soon wore off. I was playing terribly. It felt as though I was a puppet, and a vindictive puppet master was forcing me to make the most basic of errors.
It wasn’t long before I dropped the first set 6-0. I was in full-on self-sabotage mode, an experience all too familiar to me both on, and off, the court. However, just as the match was about to run away from me, I made an important change.
I started to alter my state. From years of immersing myself in the personal development world, and through my work as a hypnotherapist, I knew that the frustration and rage I was feeling would only lead to a continuation of my terrible form. I couldn’t hope to play well until I got myself feeling good.
This I did, raising my energy and reaping the rewards of my positivity by winning the second set 6-2.
At this point (1 set a piece), the match, and tournament, was to be decided by a 10 point tie break (first player to get to 10 wins).
It was here that my loser mindset kicked in.
I looked at my opponent and thought, “I’ve done really well. I’ve never beaten this guy and I’ve turned the match around. I was barely able to hit the ball over the net in the first set and now I’ve won the second. I’m proud of that. It doesn’t matter what happens in this tie break, it’s ok if I lose.”
A split second later, though, and I couldn’t tolerate this thinking. It was not ok if I lost. I had to win.
I’d been playing tennis competitively for almost 20 years. I’d done ok but never fulfilled my potential, often self-sabotaging in important matches.
Now, here I was, 10 points away from winning my first ITF masters tournament and beating an opponent I’d yet to record a victory over. It wasn’t the time to rest on my laurels. Second place wasn’t good enough.
Right then, I decided to win. For the next 15 minutes, I didn’t allow my mind to contemplate defeat or relax. I remained focused on victory and narrowly, and somewhat nervously, edged out a 13-11 win.
After this match, something inside me changed.
I could no longer look at low book sales figures on my Amazon reports and feel sorry for myself or wake up in the middle of the night and feel frustrated at not being able to get back to sleep. Neither of these outcomes (and many more) concerned me because I knew, ultimately, I was going to win.
I’d made a decision in my mind that I was going to get what I wanted (more book sales/a full night’s sleep etc). This absence of doubt ensured I remained focused on opportunities and got the best out of myself.
I hope this blog post will help you do the same.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
In July of this year, Andrew Tate was the most googled person on the planet.
His extreme views (in the eyes of the mainstream media) captivated the minds of the younger generation, providing a breath of fresh air in a world where feminism has, perhaps, overstepped its mark and there are so few outlets for men to experience an adventurous, autonomous life.
He’s charismatic, often spouts outrageous and attention-grabbing rhetoric, and has real world credibility (being a former world champion kickboxer). This combination has enabled him to garner a vast online following, where sign ups to Hustler’s University (his online training programme teaching students how to become financially free) are well in excess of 100,000, making him a reported $11 million in just one month.
Added to that, prior to being de-platformed in August of this year, his social media following was running well into the millions.
It’s undeniable, as I sit down to write this blog post, that Andrew Tate has a huge amount of influence. Whether for entertainment, enlightenment or to be outraged, people are listening to him.
But is he deserving of this reach?
Furthermore, is there any value in what he has to say or offer?
This is a subject I want to explore because, at least on one issue, Andrew Tate has a message very similar to mine.
Andrew Tate teaches his students how to “escape the matrix.” Since 2012 I’ve been writing about how to Escape The System.
So, it would appear, we have a lot in common. We both believe that today’s society traps people, presenting them with a narrow spectrum of boring avenues for making a living and expecting them to be happy within these confines. Furthermore, we’ve had our creativity, individuality and vision stifled by a world that expects us to think and behave in a certain way.
However, despite enjoying this part of Andrew Tate’s message, in some respects, I believe he’s a false prophet.
Below, I’m going to share 3 reasons as to why you should be cautious about what he has to say.
Is Andrew Tate as misogynistic as the mainstream media portrays him?
It’s hard to tell.
Much like Andrew Tate’s over the top, bombastic statements, a lot of what the media says is designed to grab your attention. Furthermore, they want to trigger an emotional reaction, knowing this is the way you’ll invest time in a story.
To do this, they exaggerate their claims and attach labels to people (you should worry more about the people who label others than the target of the labelling).
In Tate’s case, he’s been banned from all of social media because of this branding.
But what has he really said or done?
On serious note, a woman made an allegation of violence against him when working for his webcam business and this, partly, led to Tate leaving London and relocating to Romania.
The stain of abuse hasn’t escape him, though, as his Romanian mansion was raided by police after they received a tip off that he’d transported a US woman to the country for the purposes of sex work and that she was being held against her will.
I have no way of knowing the validity of these accusations. Tate wasn’t charged in the first incident and the investigation into the second case is ongoing.
For this reason, I can’t comment. All I will say is that if there’s any merit in these claims then the rest of this blog post is pointless. Any man who’s violent towards women or coerces them into activities they don’t want to do, shouldn’t be emulated or listened to. This is a given. I don’t think it warrants any further explanation.
But let’s focus on one incident that what we can actually prove.
In a recent Piers Morgan interview, Andrew Tate defended his belief that, once married, a woman is a man’s “property.” He believes this idea is validated by the ancient religions of Christianity and Islam and seems to long for a time when women were restricted by more traditional roles.
He’s not alone in this thinking. To a lesser extent, Jordan Peterson (and you can read 3 reasons why he shouldn’t be listened to by clicking here), and other popular internet figures like Elliot Hulse, hark back to more religious times and lament the breakdown in traditionally defined gender roles.
Here, Andrew Tate is making a mistake. You can’t promote yourself as a paragon of freedom, and the man who is going to help people “escape the matrix,” when that freedom only applies to 50% of the population.
Longing for a time when religion exerted a greater influence over society is a cry for greater oppression, and not just for women.
While it’s true that today’s ethical and moral standards are in the gutter, taking a step back is not the way to go. We need to find new ways of challenging unhealthy levels of promiscuity, re-establishing the importance of love and combating the influence of materialism.
In this instance, Tate needs to be more creative in his thinking.
Andrew Tate loves to flash his wealth. He often shoots videos while standing in front of a fleet of expensive luxury cars and talks about his ability to hire private jets and fly to anywhere in the world.
These braggadocio claims carry a lot of appeal to some young men. They want to emulate him, misguidedly thinking this lifestyle is the pinnacle of 21st century living.
So, what do they do?
As disciples of Tate, they enrol in Hustler’s University, thinking within this program they’ll find the keys to a life beyond their wildest dreams.
What they don’t realise, though, is that Tate is selling them a fantasy.
You can’t learn to be Andrew Tate or have his lifestyle through Hustler’s University. Much of his “success,” fame and wealth is down to his personality and this is something you can never emulate.
Instead, what you’re left with is a course that teaches you how to make money.
Of course, this isn’t a bad thing and the training offered in Hustler’s University (which focuses on generating wealth online through a variety of mediums like copywriting, freelancing, E-commerce, Amazon FBA and investing in crypto-currency and stocks) could be valuable. However, to some degree, it’s empty.
Don’t get me wrong, financial freedom is a worthy goal. However, it’s only half the picture.
Tate tells you to get rich so you can “Escape the Matrix.” This is fine. But, if the way in which you’re getting rich is meaningless and uninspiring, then you’ve just, invertedly, bought into the Matrix by working solely for money.
Escaping the Matrix is more than financial status. You could be a multimillionaire yet still confined by its limiting mindset.
True freedom is found when you enjoy your work, it’s meaningful to you and it provides enough money so that you don’t have to spend your time working a job you hate to make a living. This can be achieved without needing a copper Bugatti.
In a YouTube video which has subsequently been removed, “How Andrew Tate made his first MILLION DOLLARS,” Tate discusses how, after finishing his career as a kickboxer, he set up a webcamming business in London. During this time, he mentions that he was in debt and that his life was at risk if he didn’t pay.
As a result, the success of the webcamming business was a necessity. He was in bed with some very dangerous people and his life could have been over if he didn’t turn a profit.
Andrew Tate moved to Romania in 2017. Once there, he opened up 15 casinos. In a video titled “The Dark Reality of Andrew Tate’s Rise to Fame . . .” made by YouTuber Patrick Cc, he can be seen discussing this move at just after the 19-minute mark. He mentions that he approached, “three guys, mafia brothers,” and proposed a deal with them, suggesting he could franchise their casinos. This, it seems, didn’t work out but from the way Tate talks in the video, it’s clear that he did come to some kind of arrangement with the Romanian, or Eastern European, Mafia to participate in the casino business.
If you’re a fan of Andrew Tate, none of this is encouraging.
I don’t know whether he’s a criminal himself, but his connections are an immediate red flag.
The underworld is nothing to mess with, either directly or by association. While Tate is correct in pointing out that almost all of our societies are corrupt, the way to challenge them is not through taking part in that corruption.
Not only will your actions hurt other people (which is a valid reason, in of itself, never to engage in criminality) but you’re exposing yourself to the risk of having your liberty removed. Get caught, and it’s likely you’ll face jail time.
Is there any greater definition of someone being trapped in the Matrix than a man who’s had his physical freedom taken away?
Knowing that Tate has had connections with criminals, you should ask yourself the following question. Is he the best person to take advice, or buy products, from?
There is a possibility that he too, like many criminals, is trying to scam you out of your money.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
(image taken courtesy of Rostyslav Drysov photostream flickr.com)
Your mind is your most powerful tool for personal transformation.
Not your diet, not adopting “good” sleeping practices, not some wonder drug and not changing your habits.
Don’t get me wrong, all of the above are important but, when it comes to making a shift that will render you, and your life, unrecognisable to someone who knew you 10 years ago, it’s your mind that’ll have the biggest impact.
This is because, by mastering your mind (with the 10 rules I’m about to give you), you’ll be altering the cause of your environment, circumstances and present bodily conditions, not just dealing with the symptoms.
The following 10 rules have been created from my 20-year journey into exploring, and understanding, the workings of the mind.
This journey began, and was inspired by, some seminal works on the subject (the following are recommended reading if you want to explore further – The Power of your Subconscious Mind, As a Man Thinketh, Think and Grow Rich, The Power of Now, Psycho-Cybernetics, Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting, Becoming Supernatural), over 15 years of working with clients as a hypnotherapist and, most importantly, my own experiments into using this power to change my life.
Starting today, think only about the outcomes you want to achieve.
Are you preparing for an important speech, pitch or presentation?
See your audience being wowed. Imagine your words flowing and the information you’re sharing having the desired impact. Think about people coming up to you at the end, or emailing you, and telling you how good your presentation was and how much inf0rmation they gained.
If ever you think about forgetting your lines, how much pressure you’re under or what you stand to lose if the pitch isn’t successful, then banish these thoughts. Instead, focus firmly on one of the positive outcomes above.
Apply this rule to anything you want to achieve.
Every day, take time out of your hectic schedule to focus on either achieving the outcomes you desire or living the life you want.
How much time?
Five minutes is sufficient (but you can spend longer if you want).
At present, all I do is repeat seven goals, 3 times over, upon waking up in the morning and going to bed at night.
Here are three of these goals;
This particular approach may, or may not, work for you. It doesn’t matter. There are many different ways you can focus your mind.
You could;
Choose whatever method works best for you (or create your own).
Alongside your daily mind focusing routine, use the moments when your mind isn’t actively engaged to focus on the outcomes you want to achieve or the life you want to live.
Obviously, this doesn’t apply when working, engaged in a conversation, playing a sport or taking part in a hobby. On these occasions, and many more, your mind should be focused on the task, or person, at hand.
However, at all other times (see list below), you can return your thoughts to the contemplation of the outcomes you want to achieve and the life you want to live;
Whether you’re completing your daily mind focusing routine, or channelling your thoughts when your mind isn’t actively engaged, keep it simple.
Whenever you focus your thoughts, you’re giving an instruction to your subconscious mind. This part of your mind responds best when fed with clear, concise directions.
For example, if you want to recover from any kind of ailment, or disease, then you would repeat, over and over again (until you receive the outcome you desire) instructions and affirmations like,
Alter your instructions depending on the objective you want to achieve.
To make a greater impression on your subconscious mind, create a visual accompaniment to the thought you’re thinking.
For example, with the mind focusing routine mentioned in Rule 2, I link each outcome to a visual image.
All of these images are meaningful to me. Find the ones that trigger a similar reaction in you.
There must be an emotional connection with the thoughts you’re thinking and the images you’re visualising. Without this vital ingredient, your thoughts are powerless and will lack the ability to influence your subconscious mind.
It’s estimated that we think around 6,000 thoughts a day. Very few of these have any impact on the direction of our lives. However, if you can inject a thought with a powerful positive emotion then it can bring you the outcome you desire (BEWARE: This works just as well for powerful negative emotions).
In his book, Becoming Supernatural, author Dr Joe Dispenza tells his readers to, “continuously fall in love” with their vision for the future. This is how powerful your emotions need to be.
For peak performance, and to prevent anxiety from holding you back, learn to live in the now.
If ever you find yourself distracted by mindless mental chatter, or worrying about the possibility of something going wrong, ask yourself this question, “Where am I now?”
And then answer it.
Notice everything around you and describe it, either out loud or in your head.
This simple practise forces you out of your head and into the world. As a result, you’ll be able to give all of your attention to whatever it is you’re doing and perform at your best. Furthermore, your fears won’t escalate and prevent you from taking the action necessary to move your life forwards.
Over the course of an average day, your critical voice is going to throw all kinds of negative statements at you in response to what you’re doing.
It’ll tell you that;
ALL OF THESE STATEMENTS ARE A LIE.
In his book, The Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle explains that there are two competing forces in our minds.
The first is the “I,” which is our essence, represented by our personality, emotions and dreams.
The second is the “self,” which is artificial, represented by our internal dialogue.
Tolle teaches us to separate these two entities. Understand that your “self” isn’t who you are. It’s just a very annoying voice, attempting to sabotage the good you intend to create.
Therefore, you must NEVER listen to this voice. Instead, ignore it and, eventually, it’ll weaken and go away.
We live in an age where it’s possible to avoid any type of silence or deeper thought.
We have podcasts, the radio or Spotify to listen to. We have Netflix, YouTube or the cinema to watch. And, if we ever need to be distracted, we have social media or the internet, to browse through.
It’s now possible to continuously jump from one information stream to another without ever having to engage in the practise of disciplining your mind or focusing your thoughts.
This isn’t healthy. While there’s nothing wrong with doing any of the above, you must set aside time every day (in addition to your daily, mind focusing routine) to be alone with your thoughts and direct them towards your higher purpose.
You don’t have to do all the heavy lifting.
For the occasions when you’re struggle to motivate yourself, use inspiring songs, movies and books to provide the boost you need.
Do whatever you can (excluding becoming dependent on drugs) to get yourself in an inspired, high-energy state.
Follow all 10 of these rules and something incredible will happen.
Your subconscious mind will respond by providing you with the ideas, chance encounters and peak states that will enable the realisation of your dreams.
The power to change your life is within you. Your mind can either set you free, or cage you through the forces of fear, confusion and self-doubt.
Faithfully follow the rules above, and give yourself enough time to master them, and there’s no force in the universe that can prevent you from getting to where you want to go.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
Recently, I went back to working a 9 to 5.
After 20 years of setting my own hours while working as a tennis coach, hypnotherapist and writer, I decided I needed more structure and certainty in my life.
I was fed up with not knowing when the next lesson, client or book sale was coming. It bothered me that I could end up working at 11 o’clock at night or on Sunday’s.
So, I took the plunge and made a decision to . . . . . .
block out an entire week and work 9 to 5 on finishing my fourth book, The Rebel Code.
Ok, so I wasn’t entirely truthful with the title of this blog post. I haven’t gone and got myself a regular job or revisited my days of working in a sports retail store.
I’m still self-employed and working as a writer. However, the way in which I work changed and I learned a lot from the experience.
For an entire week (Monday to Sunday), I worked from 9am until 5.30pm. I took small, 5-minute mini breaks throughout the day, had 30 minutes at lunch and, other than that, worked consistently for 7 hours.
I now want to share my experiences with you, hoping you might benefit from my unique perspective.
Remember, the last time I worked this way was 20 years ago. As a result, I approached my 9 to 5 with fresh eyes.
Whereas there might be something you’ve overlooked, become blinded to or taken for granted, I was made acutely aware of the impact of working this way during my one-week experiment.
Furthermore, there’s just as much to learn if you’re self-employed.
It would be arrogant to assume working a 9 to 5 is an inferior and less desirable way to work just because, on the surface, it appears to offer less freedom and flexibility. There could be hidden benefits you’ve overlooked.
So, without further ado, here are the discoveries I made from one week of working a 9 to 5.
The first good thing about working a 9 to 5 is that it forces you to get to bed early the night before. I was working from home, so I didn’t have to worry about getting up early for a commute. However, I made sure I was getting ready for bed by 11pm and was asleep before midnight.
Prior to working a 9 to 5, it wasn’t unusual for me to be working (or, more often, wasting time watching YouTube videos) at around midnight and not falling asleep until 1am. Afterall, if my first tennis lesson, or hypnotherapy appointment, wasn’t until 11am the next day, I had no reason to be up early.
This isn’t an efficient way to work. Typically, the time between 11pm and 12am was wasted and, because I was going to bed so late, I wouldn’t start work on my writing until 10am.
I was losing an hour of productivity per day. However, when I started working a 9 to 5, that all changed.
Any delay to my bedtime would mean a delay to my 9am start and a subsequent delay to my 5.30pm finish. Because I faced this time pressure, I became much more efficient with my day. Instead of waking up, taking my time making breakfast, relaxing for a bit, checking my phone and scrolling through social media, I would eat my food and get straight down to work.
Likewise, when evening came, there was no prolonged period of time relaxing on the sofa and checking my phone. I allowed myself an hour for my favourite tv series or a movie and that was it (I kept my phone in the other room to eliminate distractions).
Ironically, although I worked longer than usual (50 hours a week), in some respects, I felt I had more time at my disposal because I wasn’t wasting any of it.
Another benefit to working a 9 to 5 is that it helped me prioritise my most important work.
While working a 9 to 5, my writing came first. Before, I might schedule a game of tennis in the middle of the day and lose two and a half hours (including travel) of productive time. Now, if I wanted to play tennis, or go to the gym, or do anything else, it had to be done after 5.30pm.
This meant that writing got my undivided attention and nothing interrupted this focus.
The results were noticeable.
Although I could have written more, I completed 11,000 words over the course of the week. Compare this to my usual output of around 2000 words per week (although I have the added distractions of teaching tennis lessons and seeing hypnotherapy clients), and you can see the difference this makes.
Mid-way through the afternoon on the Monday, my head started to ache. I’d never spent more than 6 hours writing in a day and, when I did work for longer periods of time, there were always lengthy breaks in between.
Spending close to 7 hours straight staring at a computer screen isn’t healthy.
By the afternoon, I noticed my thought process slowing down. I wasn’t as sharp. The words that I did write (my writing speed also declined) didn’t always make sense and I lost all ability to assess the quality of my work. As a result, although I’d spent 7 hours writing, only 4 to 5 hours represented work of true quality.
Perhaps there’s still value in completing those additional 2 to 3 hours. Afterall, I was getting work done, albeit slowly, and every word written got me one step closer to completing the book. However, I couldn’t help but notice I was a far more inspired writer when following my old way of working.
This led me to the conclusion that working for 7 hours straight (regardless of the work you do), isn’t the best way to be creative and productive.
I’m a more efficient writer when I work for a couple of hours, have a substantial break and then work for another two. This way I’m refreshed and actually looking forward to the writing process.
While working a 9 to 5, I was getting to 3pm and then counting down the remaining two and a half hours until the end of the day. I needed some variety to ignite the creative flow and do my best work.
As already mentioned, I didn’t have to make a commute. From bedroom to writing desk (which you can see in the photo below), takes me 10 seconds. For this reason, I had an additional one to two hours a day at my disposal.

Some people aren’t so fortunate. For them, a 9 to 5 is more like an 8 to 6 (or much worse).
I think if I’d been working such a schedule, it would have soon become intolerable.
Part of what made my experiment enjoyable was that I had the entire evening free. It was great knowing I could shut down my laptop at 5.30pm and then lose myself for at least 5 hours with whatever I wanted to do. However, had I been returning home at 6.30pm, and knowing I needed to be getting ready for bed at 10pm, the novelty of having a free evening would have very quickly worn off.
What does 3 hours a night really give you the time to do?
You might be able to get to the gym, prepare and eat your evening meal and then relax for a little, but that’s it. There’s no time for anything else (especially so if you have children to look after) and this is depressing.
Not just that, though, it’s incredibly unhealthy.
Most office jobs are sedentary. If you don’t walk to work, it’s unlikely you’d be reaching even 1000 steps in a day (let alone the recommended 10,000). This represents a total lack of exercise in your life which, long-term, can be disastrous for your health (Peter Attia, a Canadian Doctor who specialises in longevity, revealed on The Joe Rogan Experience that having very high cardiovascular fitness gives you a 5 fold reduction in all-cause mortality compared with someone of below average fitness).
You NEED to make time for exercise.
This is a non-negotiable. However, if you only get 3 free hours per night, it can be very difficult to do this consistently.
What if you want to meet your boyfriend or girlfriend, go to an event, have something important to take care of or, like many people, need to work overtime? It won’t be possible to do these things and exercise. A sacrifice must be made and, for most people, its often their health.
For your health alone, working a 9 to 5, consistently, for years and decades of your life, is not a feasible way to live.
It’s physically, emotionally and spiritually damaging.
One fundamental ingredient to living a good life is to feel alive.
This is hard to achieve when, every day, you have to be at the same place, at the same time, often doing the same thing.
Although my experiment taught me it’s great to prioritise the work that’s most important to you, and eliminate distractions, this can’t be done at the expense of enjoying your life.
No amount of money would convince me to forgo the variety in my life and work 50 to 80 hours a week at just one thing (even if I loved that thing).
Money is not worth feeling miserable and unhealthy for. Instead, consider taking what’s best about a 9 to 5 schedule (the focus and prioritisation it provides), and adapt it to a working life where you negotiate flexible working hours with your boss or are completely in charge of your time.
Personally, I’ll be doing more 9 to 5 weeks in the future. However, I’ll NEVER work a 9 to 5!!
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You’ll find the tips on developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
(image taken courtesy of Steve Koukoulas photostream on flickr.com)
Since the dawn of humanity, there have been three types of people – leaders, followers and rebels. Which one are you?
Leaders are driven by a need to acquire and utilise power. They want to control. Whether this drive is born of ego or nature is, sometimes, unclear. Either way, they excel at motivating others (either through fear or encouragement), fighting threats and maintaining cohesion.
Leaders occupy the highest positions within our societies. Sometimes respected, sometimes feared, they are almost always obeyed. They are confident, sure of themselves, and certain that the society, or organisation, in which they operate is right.
They typically, although not always, occupy the top positions in small, medium and large companies and corporations, the military, politics, education, justice, finance and almost any major industry of which you can think. They make ideal managers, CEO’s, presidents, heads of department, generals, entertainers, senior coaches, captains of sports teams and partners of law, accountancy and other professional firms (although you’d be wrong to assume everyone occupying these positions is automatically a leader).
The leaders’ role is to enforce and protect the status quo. They benefit financially, intrinsically and socially from the continuation of the present system. Therefore, they’ll do anything they can to maintain the existing power structures within the society they live or the organisation they work.
Are leaders’ good people? They can be. A minority use their inclination to lead for the protection of the vulnerable and to ensure the organisations, or family units, they govern are done so according to the principles of justice, fairness and integrity. They want to see a company, or other people, thrive and feel it’s their life purpose to facilitate the betterment of all. However, the majority of leaders are driven by ego and this has the unfortunate consequence of ensuring they’ll do anything to maintain their position of power.
These leaders may not set out to harm other people, companies or the planet, but if it’s a choice between losing power or ensuring the right thing is done, then the unscrupulous leader will always protect their position. Even if it means another person’s life is ruined, a company is forced out of business or the planet’s resources are ravaged, the unscrupulous leader won’t hesitate to make such a call.
Good leaders, although still being driven by a need for power, would never go this far. Instead, they’ll ensure the right thing is done even if it contradicts their short-term personal interests. They do this knowing they can always rise again and acquire power through some other job or position.
Leaders are predominantly extroverts. They’re happy to be the loudest voice in a social setting and are equally at ease presenting in front of a group of people or instructing their subordinates on a battle plan or company strategy. They like to entertain, impress and be the centre of attention.
Throughout history, the leader has been fundamental to maintaining stability (which, in turn, facilitates growth and prosperity) and ensuring the rules are obeyed. However, the leader has also been responsible for countless power struggles (leading to war and destruction) and resisting new ideas and change (stunting humanities growth).
Followers are driven by the need for security. Although capable of enjoying themselves, deep down, they feel threatened by life. They fear running out of money, getting ill, losing their job and being ostracised by society, friends, partners and in their place of work.
Followers adopt a ‘safety first’ approach to life, avoiding significant risks unless they are forced to take them. The follower doesn’t set their sights on winning or creating a legacy. Instead, they focus on ‘getting by.’
Followers occupy almost all positions in society. They are, by far, the largest personality group and this means you’ll find them everywhere. You’ll see them in hospitals, working as nurses and doctors and you’ll find them at schools, working as teachers and departmental heads. Major companies and corporations are flooded with followers. They begrudgingly accept excessive working hours, being screwed over when it comes to promotion and the unethical decisions of the leaders they work for, in return for a monthly pay check. The police, the civil service and armed forces are also packed with this personality type. You’ll also find many followers in low skilled roles (factory workers, fast food chain servers, retail assistants and cleaners).
Surprisingly, followers’ sometimes occupy leadership roles. Supervisors and managers are, quite often, followers who have been granted a limited amount of power. They may appear to be leaders, when compared with those below them in the company hierarchy, but they do very little real leading. Instead, they simply carry out the orders of the leaders above.
The follower’s role is to administer the status quo. They’re the glue that binds the system together. Although they don’t maintain order, they facilitate it by being hard working, dependable and, most importantly, limiting the questions they ask.
Are followers’ good people? Some of them are amongst the most kind hearted and nicest people you’ll meet. They don’t ask for much yet are always willing to help. While lacking personal ambition, they’ll do anything for a friend, loved one or relative. However, other followers live their lives wearing a mask.
Underneath some followers apparent selflessness are scared people stymied by societal expectation. Their motivation for helping is not always love. Sometimes, it’s because they believe helping is expected of them and fear being ostracised if they don’t. Amongst their worst traits are a secret desire to see other people fail, an overly negative outlook and blaming others for their own misfortune.
Followers can be either introverts or extroverts. They’re easily led by the company they keep and will do almost anything to ensure they fit in. If they’re in a loud and boisterous group, they’ll make sure their voice is heard. However, if they’re in a quieter environment, these extroverted tendencies will soon disappear as they keep their heads down and do their best not to be noticed.
Throughout history, the follower has been fundamental to the sustenance of the human race, displaying both a tendency to care for others and an ability to keep kingdoms, countries and organisations running relatively smoothly. However, they’ve also been culpable in humanities grossest atrocities, blindly watching or taking part (using the excuse they’re only doing their job) while countless others suffer.
Martin Luther King Jr once said, “In the end we will remember not the words of our enemies but the silence of our friends.” A follower’s concern for their own security can be deadly for others.
Rebels are driven by the need for freedom. They want to live life on their own terms. Unlike leaders, they have no desire for power over others. However, unlike followers, they absolutely will not tolerate another person having power over them (especially if this power is abused).
Money, in of itself, is not important to a rebel. They find little happiness in consumption. However, because they value their freedom so highly, money can become important as a means to an end – granting them the ability to live a self-determined life.
Rebels occupy some of societies most extreme positions. You might find them at the very top as their creativity, and ability to think outside the box, leads them to become billionaire entrepreneurs and pioneers within their industry. Many outstanding writers, musicians and artists are also rebels.
Some rebels campaign on a political issue or enter a life of public service. Their desire to affect change sees them eschew personal gain and give their lives to a cause greater than themselves.
Other rebels shun the limelight and are content with living life on their own terms. These are the owners of small businesses, solopreneurs and the people with two or three side hustles.
Not all rebels are successful. Unfortunately, many experience a life of unrealised potential as they struggle to find their place in the world.
Without any obvious outlets for their creativity and unique perspective, some rebels try to “fit in” with society’s roles and norms. This can lead to them holding down regular jobs and marriages. On the surface, they appear to live “normal,” well-adjusted lives. However, underneath, they can’t shake the feeling they’ve compromised their dreams and authenticity.
Some rebels can’t fake it. They struggle to maintain a job and swing between bouts of unemployment and sporadic work. These intelligent, creative and talented people fall by the wayside because the system doesn’t accommodate anyone who challenges the status quo.
This is the life of the rebel. A few soar and explore limitless horizons but many struggle, finding it impossible to adapt to a world that appears to have no place for their personality and ideas.
The Rebel’s role is to set the agenda for the leaders and followers. Such a statement may seem odd considering the previous paragraphs. However, despite the struggle so many rebels experience, many of them were born for an exceptional life.
A rebel must sense when humanity is stagnating and drag it out of its lethargy by presenting new ideas, innovations and ways of living. Their inquisitive natures, and ingenuity, have been behind almost every major paradigm shift we’ve experienced. They helped us shake off the limiting world view of superstition and embrace science. They understood the damage caused by religion controlling all aspects of society and separated the church from the state. They fought injustices, standing up to the leaders who sought to continue the barbaric practises of torture, slavery and gender repression. Rebels create change and, by doing so, establish a new agenda for the leaders to rule over and the followers to operate within.
Are rebels’ good people? Of all the categories, they are certainly the most misunderstood. Often the rebel is criticised by the leader and the follower for being selfish, aloof and a dreamer. However, this assessment only scratches the surface of the rebel’s complex psyche.
Rebels can have an unbreakable moral code. None of societies temptations can stop them from doing what they feel is right. They’ll always support their friends and loved ones and never let them down. They long for meaningful connections and will sacrifice their own desires if they feel a cause, or person, is worth that sacrifice. However, despite these positive characteristics, the rebel can also be troubled, the consequences of which can be disastrous for others (and themselves).
It’s easy for a rebel to become jaded. Living your life feeling like an alien, and that there’s no place for you in the world, can embitter even the kindest of souls. The rebels mind can be full of recriminations and accusations, pointing the finger at a society that has never embraced them and blaming it for their misfortunes.
Rebels lean towards being introverts but their introversion is unique. A rebel is rarely quiet or timid by nature. In fact, when involved in something they’re passionate about, they come alive with an energy that even the most extroverted leader can’t match. However, disconnect them from this passion and the rebel can appear distant, brooding and lost in their own world.
Rebels are deep thinkers, a trait which has both its rewards and consequences. On the plus side, the rebel’s ability to consider possibilities, products, inventions and creative works in their mind, can be the precursor to real world changes and breakthroughs. At the same time, rebels display a tendency to get lost in their thoughts. Over analysis can stymie their attempts to take action and, if persisted in, lead to depression.
Not all rebels are introverts. Some can be impulsive, spontaneous and thrive off the attention of others. This type of rebel can be incredibly charismatic and disruptive. Their keen sense of intuition, combined with the confidence to follow it, can lead to rapid success and even fame. However, if their energy is not channelled correctly, the extroverted rebel can easily slip into a chaotic form of disruption that leaves leaders, followers and less extroverted rebels picking up the pieces in their wake.
Throughout history, Rebels have been the ones to recognise societal stagnation, saving humanity from a potential downfall by presenting exciting alternatives to the status quo. However, rebels consumed by the darkness of isolation and rejection have always represented a destructive force for humanity (in most cases, only to themselves but, in the extreme and if they attain positions of power, to all they have influence over).
* * * * *
The purpose of these categorisations is not to pit one group against the other. Despite this book being focused on the rebel; the leader and follower should not be hated or belittled. A world full of rebels would be a disaster and could potentially lead to chaos.
This is a concept Jordan Peterson discusses in his book, Beyond Order: 12 More Rules for Life. Although he uses different terminology (the leader is replaced by conservatism and the rebel by creativity), he talks about balancing respect for tradition with the need to embrace change.
He calls this rule, ‘Do not carelessly denigrate social institutions or creative achievement,’ mentioning that,
A certain amount of arbitrary rule-ness must be tolerated – or welcomed, depending on your point of view – to keep the world and its inhabitants together. A certain amount of creativity and rebellion must be tolerated – or welcomed, depending on your point of view – to maintain the process of regeneration.
I disagree with Jordan Peterson on the amount (leaning more towards the need for greater rebellion – especially with the world in its current state), but he makes an excellent point. It takes every type of person to make the world work.
Be proud to be a leader. Accept, and enjoy, being follower. Embrace your rebellious nature. The world will be a better place if we live up to the best elements of our personality traits and develop a positive understanding of the roles we naturally lean towards.
What you’ve just read is an extract from my unreleased book, ‘The Rebel Code: 13 Steps to Succeed in a World where you don’t Fit In.’ If you enjoyed what you read and want a massive discount on the full book when it’s released, enter your email in the box below. This will add you to the Escape The System newsletter, where I’ll communicate with you monthly and email you about the release of the book (with an early bird discount).
(Image used courtesy of Eden, Janine and Jim photostream flickr.com)
I’m late to the party when it comes to Jordan Peterson’s work. Prior to last year, I hadn’t read a word of his books and only given his speeches, and interviews, a cursory listen.
My first impressions weren’t good. I didn’t like his whiny voice or his pompous delivery (does he ever smile?).
And that might have been that if it wasn’t for the new book I’m writing.
Noticing the success of 12 Rules for Life and 48 Laws of Power, I was inspired by the idea of adding to this sub-genre. I wanted to come up with my own rules/laws for unconventional thinkers.
Thinking I might find some inspiration by reading one of the classics in the field, I bought Peterson’s follow up to 12 Rules for Life, Beyond Order. (I’d also been commissioned to write a piece for it on the memod app. Read here.)
Despite my initial misgivings, I actually enjoyed it. So much so, I went back and read the first book as well.
Peterson’s work is well thought out, excellently written and cuttingly insightful. There’s a lot you can learn from both books. But, and this is a BIG BUT, there’s some advice which you absolutely MUST NOT follow.
Despite bring brilliant at times, when Jordan Peterson gets something wrong, he gets it horribly wrong.
In fact, the next 3 pieces of advice/outlooks should come with a public health warning. They have the potential to REALLY damage your life.
There’s one phrase that Peterson constantly repeats throughout 12 Rules for Life (I must have read it 5 times). “Life is suffering.”
Why is this outlook so destructive?
Because our brains are constantly affirming our beliefs.
In his documentary series, The Brain, Dr David Eagleman explains how our brains process information. It starts with our eyes, observing something in the world and then sending signals regarding this observation to our thalamus and then on to our visual cortex.
At this point, something incredible happens. The signals are processed in the visual cortex and then leave to continue their journey back through the thalamus and on to the cerebral cortex with an additional 80% new information added.
This is incredible because the visual cortex is the storehouse of our memories and beliefs. Therefore, these are being added to, and influencing, the information we take in about the world.
Can you see why this is a problem?
If you hold the belief “life is suffering,” it’s going to prejudice the way you look at, and interact with, the world (and not in a good way).
You’ll always be on high alert, expecting and anticipating the next disaster to strike. When a friend gives you some good news, your brain won’t process an exciting opportunity. Instead, you’ll immediately start looking for the danger that must be inherent within the possibility.
This is a terrible way to live. It leaves you prone to depression (something Peterson openly admits to experiencing throughout his life – I wonder why!), unable to enjoy life’s genuinely pleasurable moments and lacking in the spark that makes people fun to be around.
Living with this belief will cloud your entire life and this is why you MUST reject it.
Life isn’t suffering.
Peterson is wrong. Not only that, he’s guilty of writings’ cardinal sin – presenting his biases as the truth. He mistakes his worldview with the worldview.
Of course, it would be naïve to suggest suffering, at some point, won’t enter into your life. However, it’s not the basic condition of life and the backdrop against which all of your experiences will play out.
You could use any number of metaphors to explain life (metaphors that, if you are wise, you’ll consciously choose). If you can say life is suffering, you can just as easily say life is joy. Life could be a game or a lesson. Or, you could use one of Tony Robbin’s favourites, “Life is a dance.”
Are any of these the truth?
No, but that doesn’t matter.
When it comes to interpreting life, there’s no objective truth. How you see the world is how you’re going to experience it. Therefore, it behoves you to reject any overly negative worldviews and instead, choose one that will enhance your experience of life.
In Rule 11 of his second book, Peterson states,
It may therefore be that it is not the present that is most real – at least as far as our consciousness is concerned. We have to fight to “be here now,” the advice of the sages. Left to our own devices, we turn our minds instead to investigating the future: What could be? Attempting to answer that question – that is life. That is the true encounter with reality.
Peterson considers the future more real than the present. As a result, he advises his readers to live, and act, with their future selves in mind.
This is not terrible idea.
Thinking of your future self when resisting the urge to eat junk food, or doing an hour of writing on your book while lacking motivation, is a great way to live. However, when you combine this future focused approach with the belief you must “prepare for the worst” in order to “keep the horror at bay” (both quotes from Peterson’s books), you have a recipe for an anxiety disorder (which surprise, surprise is exactly what Peterson has. He opens his second book with a painful account of his battle with benzodiazepine withdrawal. He initially took the drug to medicate against anxiety).
Despite what Peterson claims, reality is not found in the future. The only place you can experience reality is in the here and now.
Of course, this doesn’t mean you should discard planning, working towards your goals and sacrificing immediate pleasure for long term gain. These traits are fundamental to success. However, when your attention is constantly on the future, and you believe there’s a strong possibility a disaster is imminent, you end up depleting yourself through worry, stress and tension.
By contrast, living in the now strengthens you.
The multiple fears you have are released and, as a result, your creativity is enhanced, you’re more fun to be around and you’re in a better state of mind to appreciate the positives in your life.
Prepare for a positive future but live in the now. This is far better advice for a successful and enjoyable life.
Peterson doesn’t believe in couples living together before they get married. He recommends that, if you’re in a relationship with someone, and it’s going well (and presumably you’ve been together for a while), the next step is to get married.
To back up this claim, he cites research undertaken by M. J. Rosenfeld and K. Roesler in the Journal of Marriage and Family. His interpretation of this research is that marriages amongst couples who didn’t live together before tying the knot, have a better success rate than those that did. However, if you read the end notes of Beyond Order, you’ll see Peterson is being economical with the truth.
Here, Peterson admits the above research does not apply to the first year of marriage. During this period of time, far more couples who didn’t live together before marriage divorce than couples who did.
Presumably, these couples, who took the incredibly foolhardy decision to get married without gaining a deeper insight into their partners habits, behaviour and psyche, discovered what a calamitous mistake they’d made.
I’d also wager that many of the couples who remain married, after never previously having lived together, did so because of religious and cultural pressure (not necessarily because their marriages were happy). My rationale for this is that marrying without first, living together is more common among arranged marriages and people who are devoutly religious (and, therefore, less likely to divorce).
So, I’m pretty sure Peterson’s claims are bunk.
Furthermore, I’m really hoping you’d never be so stupid as to follow this particular piece of advice.
If you are going to get married to someone, you must live with them before. You have to gain a deeper insight into how the two of you can coexist in a confined space and deal with the day-to-day realities of life.
Relationships can be amazing when you’re out on dates and seeing the best of the person who’s the object of your affection. But what are they like at their worst? You’ll, probably, only discover this when living together.
With this insight gained, you’ll be far better positioned to decide whether they’re marriage material.
I don’t want to appear too harsh on Jordan Peterson’s work. His books contain a great deal of wisdom, often presented in a well thought out and engaging manner.
In fact, I recommend you read them (I gave them both 4 stars out of 5).
Just remember one thing while doing so.
As with any author you read (including myself), DO NOT mistake their opinions and worldview for the truth.
Instead, you must discover what works best for you. It’s often foolish to adopt an influencer, or authorities, approach in its entirety, believing it’ll save you. Only you can do that!
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You will find the unconventional approach to developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
(image curtesy of Gage Skidmore photostream flickr.com)
I’ve now been in the writing business for 10 years!!!
On the 8th February 2012, I pressed enter on my laptop, launching my first book, Screw The System. Since that moment, I’ve worked tirelessly to establish myself as an author.
First, Screw The System was updated and then re-released as Escape The System in 2015.
Then, in 2018, I finished my second book.
Originally slated as, How to Create an Income Without Working a Boring Job, the title was changed to Do The Work you Love when I got a publishing deal with Watkins Media. This deal delayed the publication and it wasn’t until February 202o that my second book was finally released.
My third book, The Personal Freedom Manifesto, quickly followed, being released in March of 2021.

Releasing three or four books in ten years is not a lot. However, this says nothing of the countless hours I spent attempting to build an audience through methods like blogging, guest blogging, starting a YouTube channel and making videos, creating a meet up group and hosting numerous events, speaking at personal development events throughout London, promoting my work on social media, forming partnerships with other authors and learning about marketing.
In total, I’ve given approximately 8500 hours, of the last 10 years of my life, to becoming a successful author. Since 2015, I’ve kept to a schedule of working 20 hours a week, or 1000 hours a year, on my writing business.
Before that, my hours were far more sporadic. 5 hours one week, 15 the next and none the week after – a typically working schedule from 2012 to 2014 (I was supporting myself through tennis coaching and hypnotherapy at the time) – was never going to cut it.
How successful have I been with my 10 years as a writer?
What does 10 years of extremely hard work as a writer amount to when it comes to money made and books sold?
This;
Total number of books sold: 5201
(Escape The System = 3400
Do The Work you Love = 1000
The Personal Freedom Manifesto = 800)
Total number of subscribers to this/my website: 3000
Total number of subscribers to my YouTube channel: 1100
Total number of members of my ‘Success Club’ meet up group: 1015
And, now, for the big one. How much money does this equate to?
Many multiples of my book sales is the best answer I can give.
I haven’t got the exact figure. All I know is you could multiply my book sales by about 4 or 5 to get an accurate number.
Of course, these earnings are not exclusively from book sales (that would be a lot lower). Instead, while including that figure, it also includes money I receive from private coaching clients, freelance writing projects and the scraps I make from running my own personal development events.
What do you think of that?
It might sound ok-ish, not bad if this was a hobby. However, digest the next two points and see if you still think the same.
First, the rough figure I provided above is turnover. My profit is far lower.
How much lower?
I dread to think and, to be honest, I don’t have an accurate figure to hand. If I spent hours rummaging through my back taxes I could produce one, but, suffice to say, I’m probably in the black.
Second, this figure is for an entire 10 years. It’s not one year’s worth of earnings (which might be ok).
It’s ten years of blood, sweat and tears.
It’s ten years of frustration as I attempted to become a digital publisher, trying to succeed in a world where my two biggest weaknesses – technology and marketing – are exposed on a daily basis.
It’s ten years of having my expectations dashed with every book, blog post and video I release.
It’s ten years of watching other authors succeed, whose work is no better than mine, and scratching my head trying to figure out what they know that I don’t.
And, after ten years, what do I have to show for it?
In financial terms, close to nothing.
Fortunately, though, life isn’t measured in financial terms (at least not entirely). As tough as the previous ten years have been, there are parts of it I’ve absolutely loved.
Nothing compares to hearing from a reader who loves your work. Combined across all books, and Amazon marketplaces, I’ve had over 150 five-star reviews. Each one of these is relished as I pinch myself and realise the dream I had back in 2002 (of being able to create something with my thoughts and words that would positively impact another person’s life), has come true.
Expression, in of itself, is also a huge reward. For the decade prior to becoming a writer, I lived my life never communicating what I truly felt. I stuck to my nice guy, tennis coach persona which, although not fake, only expressed part of my authentic self.
To be able to sit down and articulate my contempt for modern society (in a public forum – not just my head) is such a relief and release.
Finally, there are the connections I’ve made. Through my writing, I’ve made friends, formed a tribe and realised I’m not alone.
Before 2012, I thought I was the only person who looked at the world the way I did (modern jobs are little better than economic servitude, our societal tendency to accept mediocre lives is insane and the system is set up to enable the elites to maintain their wealth and power while the common man, and woman, gets shafted). However, through my writing, I discovered other people who share these points of view.
This gives me hope and a sense of connection I previously lacked.
While these are important, life enhancing, factors, any sane individual has to, at some point, sit down and ask themselves whether all the effort is worth the reward.
Was it?
As crazy as it sounds, I’m tempted to say, ‘yes.’
Sure, I can zoom out, gain a more objective understanding of these last 10 years and listen to anyone who might say, ‘you’re wasting your life.’
That line of thinking seems credible. I could have certainly made a lot more money if I’d chosen to do something else.
However, try as I might to rationalise my situation in this way (and I have many times), it never feels right.
In times of doubt, I always go back the same thought process.
I know who I am.
I know that bashing my head against a brick wall and trying to fit this round peg into a square hole isn’t going to work.
Therefore, I have to make my own way and I can’t rely on society to do it for me.
If I’m going to do that then I have to follow my inspiration because it’s the only form of positive guidance I’ve got.
There are a few dreams/ideas/causes that generate this feeling but writing is the one I chose, the one I’ve developed skills and contacts in, and the one on which I’m furthest down the road to success.
All of this means that becoming a best-selling author is the hill I’m ready to die on.
Do you know what this means?
Perhaps you’ve heard the phrase.
At some point, an army must make a stand. They must find their hill and defend it till the end because wavering or running (finding another dream to pursue) will only weaken them and waste even more time.
That army is either going to succeed or be totally obliterated. However, because they’ve made the commitment and gone ‘all in’ on securing the victory, they give themselves the best possible chance of coming out the other side.
That’s where I’m at with my writing.
On balance, it’s probably taken more than it’s given but succeeding as an author runs so much deeper than financial return or status.
When I 20 years old, I felt completely lost. There isn’t space here to elaborate on why but, suffice to say, I spent 3 years feeling totally disillusioned with my life.
Then, in February of 2002, I read a book that blasted through my self-doubt and gave me the hope I could turn my life around.
This was an amazing gift. It felt like magic was contained within the pages, with each one bringing me back to life.
I want to do that for someone else. I want to transmute magic through words and ideas and touch the deepest part of a person’s soul.
Added to that, I also feel my writing is a small attempt to do what’s right in the world.
I grew up in the 80s. Star Wars made a huge impression on my psyche.
The Rebels had to beat the Evil Empire.
Our evil empire is a system, one that’s obsessed with money, image and appearances and thinks the material is the only way to value and judge life.
I disagree. I think substance, freedom and following your inspiration is more important. I want to use my writing to promote these ideas and, by doing so, challenge the hegemony of the evil empire.
It can’t win.
So, when you combine both my passion for the medium of books and my belief in taking a stand for what’s right, perhaps you understand how I justify the continuation of my writing journey.
It hasn’t been easy. In fact, it’s been heart-breaking at times. But, when something is important enough, you’ll bounce back from every defeat and keep going until the end.
Remember that as you pursue your own crazy dream. At some point you must find your hill and make a stand.
If you want to discover a passion you can make a living from and overcome the fears that are holding you back, check out my free course 30 Days to Escape The System. Click here to get the course right now! (You will find the unconventional approach to developing belief and self-confidence fascinating!)
Recognising that the world is going through rapid and violent challenges, academic institutions are revolutionising the educational system to transform students into agents of change. However, the work starts with creating more inclusive and holistic educational systems. For example, it was not until 1970 that the passage of the Handicapped Children Education Act was legislated in the UK. Through this systematic revolution, educational institutions were reformed to be more inclusive towards marginalised sectors. Aside from making more inclusive learning environments, institutions are also adopting the concept of transformative education to encourage individuals to create a just, healthy, and sustainable world.
Transformative education is a theory of learning founded by American sociologist Jack Mezirow. Through his research, he discovered that learners tend to examine their past ideas and shift their perceptions as they learn and reflect on new information. This theory emphasises that learners do not passively absorb information but also experience a fundamental change in their worldview and values.
This new perspective on the educational process has pushed different institutions to create a more holistic approach to learning. In fact, UNESCO is urging institutions to be oriented towards a transformative system so that individuals can gain new perspectives on values, such as collaboration, empathy, problem-solving, environmentalism, and social justice. By going beyond academic learning, individuals can form values and beliefs that will help them create informed decisions for themselves, the community, and the world.
Improved perspectives and mindsets
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Greater preparation for work and civic responsibilities
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Enhanced awareness and critical thinking skills
Transformative education also shapes individuals by opening up their minds to different ideas. For instance, the EcoJustice Course developed by American and German institutions combined epistemology, ontology, and ethics to educate learners on sustainability. The course addressed the learners’ knowledge in sustainability before shaping their role and ethical perspective on the matter. By tackling the personal, social, and ecological aspects of sustainability, learners were able to expand their knowledge to determine how they could contribute to sustainability causes. Similarly, transformative learning can challenge students’ previous notions and improve their awareness of crucial issues.
Nowadays, individuals need to gain fundamental skills, broaden their mindset, and follow the right values to be an agent of change. And a transformative system of education is one way of ensuring this in today’s youth. This should be the case whether one is learning within the four walls of a classroom or outside of it. In regards to the latter, consider becoming a part of our Escape the System community. Our resources will provide you with the right information and skills so you can make informed decisions and live a fulfilling life.